Travis & Astrid, living in Rwanda

Christmas and New Years in Rwanda

2009-01-01T16:27:00.009+02:00

Yaida painting a Christmas tree.
Withrow family Nani, Travis, Jasmin, Yaida, Astrid and Zoey
Christmas with those who live simple is greatly enjoyable as the little things that make the day different are not considered "nice" but "wow, awesome" instead.
In Rwanda Christmas day starts as the clock turns fro 11.59 on the 24th of December to midnight. The cry of a baby on national radio kicks of the day to celebrate Christ's birth. By lack of radio, Stella, Danielle, Travis and I stayed up and at midnight we sat under the boys window where Stella did a perfect imitation of the cries of a new born baby. All this to great delight of the children.
Danielle (Nani and Zoey's teacher) and Stella tired from all the Christmas activities.
Jean Pierre thrilled with his bandana.
Emmanuel
Divine's first Christmas where she was allowed to celebrate and rejoice in Gods gift to her.
The day, one of games, presents, music and a movie, ended with a delicious meal; BBQ-ed meat (see below) soda's and more food than we could eat!

New years was wonderful. After a movie we all went outside where Travis, Ruben and some of the boys made a bonfire.

Erin and Jean Paul trying to stay warm
In order to stay awake after the hot tea Stella and the children did some traditional Rwandan dances, to great delight to all of us.

Worship and dance kept us going all the way till midnight. When we yelled and screamed our thank you for the new year Jesus.

Danielle to the left. Christine cuddled up with Beatrice and Jean Pierre.
Thank you to those who have donated funds and items so that the children and us could all have a wonderful Christmas and New Years!

Day to Day life

2008-12-03T09:03:00.005+02:00

What does our day look like at the Gilead House?

We have loads of fun, especially now that the children are on school break. The Rwandan school year starts in January through mid-November. A wonderful opportunity now to get the children far ahead in their English and creativity skills.
Breakfast is served at 7 am. (a little later than normal due to the school break) Travis and I make the breakfast, a bulgar (wheat) porridge with sugar and milk. We start cooking it around 6 am. It is delicious and extremely healthy.
After clean up Stella starts teaching English class at 8.30 followed by an African Chai, tea break. At 10 we start Bibleclass, where we read a passage of scripture and discuss it together. The children are starting to learn to use their imagination and picture themselfs as one of the disciples of Jesus now that we study the book of John. It has been great to hear their responses!
After bibleclass we do creative expression class with the children. This can be anything from acting out what we read in bibleclass to drawing, singing or dancing. Just anything that will help the children to express what is inside of them and to use their creative skill. (photo 1: Erika during expressive arts. photo 2: laughter - one of our prime ingredients -
After lunch we have a hour of rest followed by umuganda, a time where we work together in the field for cultivation or work on projects together like the one in the photo above where Travis and some of the children are finishing a pathway.
Vedaste poses by the pole of one of the soccer goals, one of the projects the boys worked on.

While we are working together or in class we enjoy the smells coming from the kitchen where our wonderful cook makes delicious meals. He is not only a blessing to us for his skill, but is also wonderful with the children. The children rotate in duo's to help the cook with meal preperations in the afternoon, as a result laughter comes out of this kitchen allmost all afternoons.
Meal time and dishes go hand in hand. Teaching individual responsability in community living, means to take care of what you have or are responsible for. This includes dishes. With a good system in place dishes for 18 people only takes 8 minutes!
With full tummies and brushed teeth we join for Circle Time. Many of us look forward to this time of the day. We have a circle leader (a different person every night) who asks every child "How was your day, what was good and what was bad." It is a time for speaking and listening, a time of forgiveness and reconcilliation where necessary. It is a time for stories.
The time is closed of by a time of prayer and intercession. Sometimes this means we have music in the bachground and the children just close their eyes and listen to God (soaking). Other times they spontaniously start interceding and asking God to come and heal them, to touch thier nation. Just the other night, one of our boys spontaniously received the gift of speaking in tongues. It is a time where we see the Lord pouring himself out on the children. A time where we see Jesus healing the whole man (John 7: 24) Those are the true times of restoration and inner healing.
Due to the intense experiences the children have with the Lord we see wonderful breakthroughs in their lifes. This is SoZo(healing of body, soul and spirit)... resulting in Gilead (heaps of testimony).
Yes, we do take volunteers...

If I had only known....

2008-11-22T15:48:00.004+02:00

If I had only known that I would ever have to do what I did today...
If I had only known that I would make the choice to feel again the pain I used to feel.
If I had only known that having God's heart would cause so much pain...
If I had only known that I would be the doorstep to trauma and heaven touching earth...A little more than a week ago we welcomed Divine into our family. Beside my four own children she made number 9 of our orphans.
Her story; heart wrenching and cruel. Her mother lost her husband and children in genocide, she herself was hit on the head with a knife, then thrown in the mass grave her family was already in. Yet she survived. A little girl was found alive form the mass grave as well whom she took under her wing. Together they made the best of life while being extremely vulnerable and so prey to many. Francine was 5 years old when she survived.
Six years later Divine was born out of rape. Divine's mother loved her dearly, but Divine did not experience her mother's love for long. Divine was just a year old when her mother died. Francine, than 12 years old cared for Divine as a sister out of loyalty to the woman who had cared for her.
Francine was blessed with study opportunities, she placed Divine in a family with cows, ensuring milk would be available to Divine. Thinking these people would care well for Divine, Francine started secondary school.
The family despised Divine, calling her a wildcat, giving her the leftover foods to eat (if there were any) with her bed to be among the cows. Daily Divine would care for up to 100 cows, clean the house, cook food and clean the stables. In the fields with the cows she was easy prey for young men.

No organization or home would take Divine in, now 8 years old. Today she is with us.
She told Francine today; no I do not ever want to go back to the old place, I love it here, I love everything about this place, name it and I love it. The smile on her face, reaching from ear to ear, would not last long...

If I had only known....
Today we had to tell Divine the truth about her life. She thought the family she had stayed in were her mom and dad. That she was just less loved then the other children in the home and had done something wrong throughout the years which led to her not being allowed to go to church nor school, nor take part in any family activities.

If I had only known....
Francine had come and shared the truth. Divine's beautiful light brown eyes searched for clarity in the confusion, her eyes filled with tears, yet she pushed them back. Like a wave washing away the sand on the shore, her life was washed away in a matter of minutes.
Everything she had ever known had been a lie. Puzzle pieces of 'why' and 'how come' fell into place, confusion would come, joy for being rescued would show in a weak smile, and then... when Francine closed the gate behind her, the tears came. Deep, deep pain was in those long sobs. Uncontrolled screaming and crying, extreme silence as she stared of in a distance, exhaustion in the end, closed off with a light sleep.

If I had only known that my heart would be ripped to pieces as I guided the process, that the look on her face would remind me of my own confusions, cries and trauma's as a child her age.
If I had only known that bringing people from darkness/lies into light/truth would mean I would have to be the one to say things like; honey, your mother and father are dead...
If I had only known that carrying the heart of the Father for orphans and the poor would be so painful, would I have ever wanted it?

Though I know that from this point of truth we can lead her in the process of building her identity in Christ, which is a wonderful process, we will mourn with her first and gently place her on the Father's lap, where she can be loved and embraced the way only a Father can.

Pray for Divine, she lost both her parents and her family today. Today, Divine became an orphan.

Embracing Perspective

2008-10-08T16:22:00.002+02:00

“What then can I say; If God is for us, who can be against us.” Romans 8:33b

The battle is raging around us her in the north. With two computers down, a house barely livable, a car that broke down again on the morning of a very important meeting concerning the purchase of our Heaven Touching Earth land, locals spreading lies about who we are and what we do, discovery that our corporation sole status in the U.S. has been revoked without notification, dishonest people trying to take items and funds, our website and so our email accounts frozen due to the sudden resignation of our webmaster, and a great deficiency of funds for our family… In Rwanda people would say: the spirits are against you. And we agree to this saying. Yes, the spirits are indeed against us.

I went to the foot of the volcano where the so called head demon of Rwanda dwells. I prayed and declared the blood of Christ over Rwanda while standing there. The atmosphere did not feel very pleasant around me, almost cold, though the sun was right on me. That same night we were woken up by an earthquake, started by that same volcano. Co-incidence?
From my backyard I see that same volcano and daily declare Jesus’ victory against that demon of fear, deceit, horror and terror. Nyabingi she is called. She has been given legal right to dwell on this volcano by the church and leaders of this nation centuries back. Look at Rwanda’s history and find the interesting role of the north of the nation in genocide ideology and other evil actions. Co-incidence?

“We do not fix our eyes on what is seen, but on what is unseen. For what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal.” 2 Cor. 4:18
Perspectives change living this battle, I call it “the embrace of Kingdom perspective”. The unseen is what has the eternal consequences; my faith, my prayers, my declarations, my response from Kingdom perspective. The seen suffers in the unseen battle, the seen prospers in the unseen victory.
It sounds somewhat easy, foolish even. My spirit is ready to embrace the fullness of the Kingdom perspective, my flesh keeps me from squeezing it tightly. Trying to find a balance? I do not recognize there being a balance between flesh and spirit, the seen and unseen, God versus the world. The perspectives teach me to go all the way. For I do not belong to the world but am a citizen of heaven (Eph 2:19, Phil. 3:20) meaning my actions need to reflect my identity; Christ Jesus.

So I keep on warring as my battle is not against flesh and blood (Eph. 6) and keep on trusting , believing by faith, not by sight (2 Cor. 5:7). What I see looks defeated, abandoned, a joke. Yet by faith I see a victory coming, a battle to be won, Jesus revealed and a glory poured out, a nation returning to the King of Kings and the Lord of Lords. It is coming, by faith I see it!

Stand with me in battle.

Astrid

Gilead House (Rwaza children)

2008-08-04T13:20:00.007+02:00

What happened to the Rwaza children?

Many of the children were tired of the constant exploitation and lack of permanent intervention to stop the abuses and suffering they endured. Some of the children were chased away from the orphanage by the old nun as they stood up against the injustices done to them.
It had started with Jean Paul, (see earlier blog entries) who almost died, and other children too were put at the side of the road like bags of garbage.
At first 5 of the children asked Stella where to go as they had no place to sleep nor to be fed. At that point we had withdrawn from the orphanage as all we provided kept being stolen by those we had employed and in order to open a home for the children in a nearby town, knowing they were contemplating escaping the bad people, as they so mercifully call it.

The first 5 arrived in May. In June 5 more followed as they too were chased away. They went to the local government representative and reported the situation. The man offered to help them go home. Do you know where you belong, he had asked. Yes we do replied the children as they led the man to the safe house we had opened for them! This is where we belong, this is our home, they said.
Stella in the center. Stella is amazing and very skilled at what she does. She is God's gift to us and the children.
All 10 children are doing wonderful! They are blooming open and both the child and us are amazed at the inner beauty and character that is being revealed.
They all love to play drama plays and we use it as one of the ways for them to express what they went through. Sometimes we just have to ask them; this really happened? As what they act out is so extreme. Though they laugh when revisiting certain memories, it takes only one question or comment that expresses sadness that they had to go through this all, to expose the true pain of the events. Healing is coming and joy fills the house they live in.

Traditional dancing; the girls cannot get enough of it.

We provide them good nutricious meals. The children are looking healthy and strong.

The safe house is called; Gilead House. Gilead was an area in biblical times where a special miracle tree was found. It's balm was a healing balm. Gilead also means; Heap/mass of testimony/witness.
We believe that the Gilead house will indeed be a place of healing and of testimony and witness, as God heals, delivers and saves the children!

Proverbs says: Raise a child in the way he should go and when he is old he will not depart from it. A child in those days were those under 12. We believe that this applies also to the spiritual / biblical principals. So we do what God's word says. The children are quick to worship and pray. They hear the voice of the Lord and obey Him. It has been such a delight to have these children. I am so proud of them.
We are still working with the local government to also receive the remaining children that are in Rwaza. Some that were there were brought back to their families. Others are still there. We are ready to receive them. Their beds are made!

We have 3 full time staff to care for the children, one house mom is in training.
Please continue to pray for the Lord's provision for the children and for the building of Heaven Touching Earth, the children's village where they will also live when the village is ready.

Home is where your heart is

2008-07-30T13:05:00.003+02:00

It was great to see our friends and family.
It was nice to eat yummie foods and live in luxury. To drive in a place where people keep the rules and respect each other. To enjoy cleanliness and the consistency of water and electricity.
Though people seemed a bit pale, it was wonderful to see those who have our heart and to visit places we once poured our heart into and used to call home.

Here I am again, the last drops of water available to us were used to flush the toilet that started to stink from a day's use without flushing. I wanted to quickly print a document but didn't succeed as electricity was off.
I though I would pour a quick glass of milk for my daughter but forgot that I had to pasteurize it first. I wanted to make a phone call only to find the network to be down and oh, even with network it would not have worked as my phone minutes were finished and the guys in the little shop in our valley didn't have any minutes for sale.
Crazy enough, I call this place my home.

After all; Home is where your heart is.
And my heart is in Rwanda.

Special Rwandan Friends

2008-06-15T06:08:00.003+02:00

The Bruton 5, our friends from Rwanda who returned to Canada back in 2006. They traveled all the way from Canada to spent just one day with us!

In Chicago we reconnected with John en Courtney who also left Rwanda in 2006. It has been amazing how deep our conversation could go and how the heart connections remained though years had passed.

San Francisco

2008-05-31T21:44:00.004+02:00

Meet: Daniel and Corrie, board members of Sozo Ministries Africa, and very dear friends that also served in Rwanda 3 years ago. Now they live in San Francisco, we drove down to stay with them.
Being with them makes us realize how much we have missed them these last years!

San Francisco traffic.

The famous Market trains down town San Fran.

Water front with the piers.

We are enjoying ourselves, time is flying for sure!

Funny San Fran story:
Travis and I decided to walk down town, enjoying walking without strollers to push and children's hand to hold. This being our first time in San Fran we used a city map to find our way around. Instead of wondering about safe and unsafe neighborhoods, we just took the shortest road and enjoyed all we saw around.
Sure enough while walking on Eddy we looked around and realized we enjoyed the people around us and were drawn to conversations with them. We stated to each other how we could enjoy living in a city like this, how we enjoyed the street life around us and how the people were fun and different.
It took a while before realizing that we had been the only white people around....
Later we heard that this was the tenderloin district, the area most whites will ignore and walk around..... the area where we felt at home... hmmm... what's up with that!

Photo Update on our R & R in Europe and States

2008-05-24T23:57:00.007+02:00

Zoey's 7th Birthday, celebrated at Red Robin with friends and the Red Robin staff singing to her!

Fun at the park.

At our condo in Lincoln City, at the Oregon coast, Pacific Ocean.

I think my kids have not been this clean in years! As the chemicals in the hot tub removed all the (possibly) remaining dirt from 3 years in Rwanda!

At the Oregon Zoo with Joel and Ali. (Dear friends in Rwanda... they are back together!)

Roasting marsh mellows with friends.

With uncle Chad (Travis's brother) and his dog, catching bubbles.

Lots of fun at our friends, Curtis and Barbara's house.

Reuniting of old friends. Girls with Rachael and Kelsi.

Going shopping at TARGET... Woohoo!

Mount Hood, beautiful view from down town Gresham.

Our time in the Netherlands:There is nothing like celebrating our national Dutch holiday called Queens day in the Netherlands.

At the North Sea, the Western coast line of the Netherlands.

Keukenhof; enjoying thousands of bright colored tulips and roses.

Day at an Amusement park with our friends Ruben & Christine.

And of course a day in Amsterdam.

The switch

2008-04-27T17:18:00.004+02:00

Just the though of it used to give me chills down my spine, while a fear of losing controll would come over me. But here I am today finding that it really is not that bad after all. Furlough... no it did not come with a well organized and planned itinerary nor with plenty of time to pack and prepare. In retroperspective this may have been the better way.

The thought of choice and wealth, being respected and in comfort, which all has been so foreign for 3 years, scared me, as I feared to be overwhelmed and nothing but an emotional mess upon receiving it.

Yaida and Jasmin enjoying a nice meal

It has been a little more than 3 weeks that I have been bathing in a structural culture, with clear cultural do's and don'ts that are all to familiar to me. Where healthy meals come out of can's and freezers and juices are vitamin C enriched. Where I can do the wash, dry cloths, do my dishes and download emails all at the same time. Where people are so respectful that they do not yell Halelujah during the church service afraid for the opinion of their more respectful, conservative neighbor.

Where I can speak freely and my thoughts may be heard.

A place so different than my home.

A people so truthful and opinionated that it makes me speechless.

here there are no poor, no needy as I know from my current home country.

Yet people complain about the tile in the sidewalk that sticks up a bit and might be a potential trip hazard.

Both have been my homeland. Both are nations I love, both have people I love. Yet... the two have absolutely nothing in common. No similarities, except this one thing...

It's people are looking for love, acceptance, security. In both nations people are crying out for a mighty move of Jesus in their land. For Him to restore it's people and for His glory to be poured out.

The switch, that is how this feels, the quick switching from one nation to another, which such extreme differences. Yes, i was overwhelmed with the overstimulis of choice and ease to comfort. But looking at it from kingdom perspective I see a people hungry for Truth and Love to enter their life, their nation. So really, it is all the same on the bottom line.

My work did not stop when entering the plane departing Rwanda, to reflect Christ is a life-style. It means being on call 24/7. Switching is no longer nessecary, we all need Jesus, we all need Love and Truth.

Silence, storm and now what...?

2008-04-14T23:13:00.004+02:00

While hanging over the engine of my car, trying to assist my husband as the steering once again stopped working (thank God we were in a parking lot when we discovered it!!!), I receive a phonecall..."I think it is all stolen..." a sad and shaken voice tells me, ..."What do we do now?"

"Nothing"is my reply. Really what would be the thing to do? Here we are trying to fix our car, 2,5 hours away from home. We would be the ones who had to identify what was stolen... nothing could be done until we would get home.

disappointment, anger and sadness flooded our emotions as we drove home, knowing what was ahead.... we thought.

A bright rainbow appears in front of me. I am immediately reminded of God's covenant with menkind, with me, if you will. As we continue our drive we come to the start of the rainbow... the Rwaza village centre. the arc of the rainbow bends north... I am awestruck, in tears, as I know what this means.

The Lord has told us before to move north, there he will fulfil his promises, where we will build our fine houses. (Deuteronomy 3 and 8).

As we drove on we went through the rainbow as you would go through a door into another place. The doorway to the fulfilment of the promises of god, his covenant. in this case his covenant with the Rwaza children, it is coming, we went through the door...

Coming home we learned that our office was completely stripped and that our personal electronical items were also stolen from our home. The damage... around $12,000.

While cleaning up the mess made by the thiefs I heard myself singing:

"Jesus, Jesus, how I love Thee,

how I prove Thee over and over.

Jesus, Jesus precious Jesus,

oh for grace to trust Thee more."

And a joy flooded my heart in the midst of loss and chaos.

While all this is going on a big miscommunication happens as we were asked to leave the country in 48 hours. This news did not surprise us but caused us to act like whirlwinds, re-arranging our lives, packing like maniacs, organizing many logistical issues and delegating responsabilities while deciding which cloths to take.

Many friends from all walks of life jumpd up to help, and shared our load. We are so blessed!!!

An hour before leaving to the airport news came that this message had been a great misunderstanding, we did not have to leave and were welcomed back when we decided a break would be appropriate at this time, after almost 3 years non stop working in Rwanda.

So here we are. In a very cold the Netherlands, surounded by friends and our home church whom has amazed us with their open arms of service and help. My dear friends, you make us all feel so loved and precious! Your acts of love to us are of indescribable value to us!

We will come to the U.S. beginning of May, where we will share about the wonderful things God is doing in Rwanda and the role SoZo Ministries Africa plays within that.

I am enjoying the luxeries and blessings that come with living in a 1st world country, but my heart is at home... in Rwanda.

I am curious to see what is coming as God so clearly spoke about his promise coming... i can't wait to tell you more about the Lord's heart for Rwanda, for Africa.

I hope to see you in the Netherlands or in the States.

When all you have is you...

2008-03-21T10:19:00.003+02:00

With our country's wellfare and insurance systems in place, with professionals to assist when others can't, with laws to protect you and demand you receive proper care in difficult times. With volunteers that have golden hearts and family that desires the very best for you, due to my life in safety, care and love, I had not entertained the reality of life without any of this. Until now.

One of our children, Jean Paul had become very sick. The doctors say it was witchcraft that caused him to look in the eyes of death. "The boy from the hopeless family" they called him at the hospital, other called him the "dead-boy". His features reminded me of the pictures on tv from the 1984 Ethiopia famine. Big eyes laying deep in their hollow eye sockets. Hip bones pointing through the cloths. Arms and legs that are no more than bones with a thin layer of skin to make it look human. Mouth and teeth crusted from dehydration.

An empty IV bag by his bed. Other patients begging me: "Take the boy for he wil die tomorrow."

After a more than 6 hour fight with lazy medical personal who did not show any concern nor care for their patients, and especially did not care for "the dead boy" we had convinced them to get an ambulance readu so we could transport Jean Paul to Kigali, where we could care for him and make sure he would receive the care he needs in order to save his life.

Jean Paul will survive! He is recovering from a double surgery, where maggets and other "black things" that are related to witchcraft (according to the doctor), were taken out of his stomach. He is eating well now and will soon be released form the hospital.

As Jean Paul is recovering he has made some conclusions that break my heart:

"Nor my father nor my mother have visited me, he said with tears in his eyes. My brother stole from the children and spend the money from sold items on prostitutes, not my medicine. My sister wears my cloths and buys buscuits for herself all the time, and I lay here naked and hungry.

The people who have received money to support me over the last years have not asked about my wellbeing, nor visited me in all these weeks.

I do not dream about my future, because to want, means to get hurt."

When we asked him what stood out as postivie to him within the current situation he replied: Mama and Papa Nani and Stella are the only people that have ever cared for me and loved me. To be together is what makes me want to live and dream!"

What can I say... When people around you are so busy to survive their trauma's and poverty and simply can not care about those around them as it hinders their own survival, and all you have is you...

I know that some of you know these feelings, I know those feelings. When you cry for help and no-one seems to hear you. When you stop dreaming because your dreams have been crushed too many times. When you suffer yet no-one reaches out to help you.

May Jean Paul's final conlusion of truth become your conclusion and testimony of truth:

"I know God loves me and has plans for my life, because when I was going to die He send people to make sure I was going to come back to life. I have seen God, I know He is true!"

For I know the plans I have for you, says the Lord, plans of hope and a future. Jeremia 29:11

This is what it is about!

2008-02-25T13:57:00.003+02:00

Trauma relief they call it here. Freedom from the consequences of genocide, of war, freedom from the pain of severe trauma. You may think this works mostly with adults and only after long counseling sessions. Yet the contrary is true.

Let me share with you the most amazing work I have seen God do in the 2,5 years of living in Rwanda.

Due to chaos inflicted by the former primary care giver on the children and even the Rwaza community, I had to make an urgency trip up to be with the children and spend a long weekend with them. One night as part of the weekly program, Stella, our Program Supervisor who lives full time with the Rwaza children, lead us in a simple Kinyarwandan song inviting God to touch us and meet us during the time of intercession. And HE DID!! As the children started praying simple selfless prayers the presence of the Lord touched many of us. Some of the children and myself became emotional. As the prayers became more fervent and specific many of us poured out our emotions to the Father. Than all of a sudden one of the 14 year old boys asked Stella: “Why is mama crying as she prays for us? Not even our own mothers have ever cried for us!”
Needless to say a new wave of emotion filled the room. I took the opportunity to remind them of their prayers way before we knew them, prayers for change and hope. How the Lord called us specifically to care for them and bring justice, even before we knew what was truly going on in the place and so answered their prayers. I shared how we have grown to love them like our own children as we have come to know them so well, how Jesus truly loves them and he keeps answering their prayers.

It was a message of hope that God has answered once and will answer again and of love of the Father expressed through us and Stella.

Tears started to flow freely, some children even grabbed towels to scream and cry in. The tears changed to a deep mourning and of grief, sadness just filled the tiny room we were in. It was so heartbreaking. Their grief was so heavy, their cries so intense. Sobbing children on their knees expressing the pain they carried for so long. The injustices and abuses they have experienced, I know I saw but a glimpse of the pain of it all in that moment. I cried with the children as we geared our cries to our Heavenly Father. Asking Him to intervene and to replace the pain of the bad things with His truth, to take our sadness and replace it with hope and peace, and again HE DID. Within 5 minutes all children were clapping, dancing and singing with hope and joy. We all laughed and hugged that night.
That night all children slept extremely well and all without nightmares! (has not happened before). The next morning I woke up at 5 am to the sound of the 14 year old boy interceding passionately for all the children, for the prior caregivers still living on the compound, for the Lord to give SoZo Ministries Africa land so we can build for the children and take them to a safe place. He thanked God that though many people claimed the kids in the past, no-one had ever claimed their hearts, but now he has a hope for a future of love and care!

You know these kiddos are anywhere from 2 through 14 years old. When God comes and touches people he will set them free from pain, from trauma, from nightmares and oppression. Physical healings will happen.

It is called trauma relief by those who do not understand what truly happens when they encounter a touch from the Creator of Heaven and earth.

The joy that filled that same room only minutes after it was filled with grief was a very strong reminder to me of the initial visions with which God opened our hearts and eyes for Rwanda. Reminding me, it has nothing to do with my ability or lack off. It was as if God was winking at me, letting me know; this is only the beginning of the move of My Hand through Rwanda! Get ready!

When life gets shakey.

2008-02-04T08:34:00.000+02:00

Take the title of this blog literaly. You may have heard on the news about the earthquakes in our part of the world. Many people died and even more were injured. During our weekly bible study I received a phonecall from the Dutch Embassy, at the same time people received phonecalls from the German and South African embassy. All sending warnings to their citizens: There is a large posablility of another large earthquake or heavy after shocks. You are adviced not to be in your house between 8 pm and midnight. Fill your bathtubs in case the quake cuts of water supply to the city. Stay with your children, by the time you would be able to gather them from their rooms it may be too late.... ...Camping next to our house...

Taking it as a big adventure we pitched our tent next to our house, blew up the airmatresses and got our first aid kid, water and a few personal items in the tent. We found rocks to put behind the tires of our car to prevent our car from rolling down our steep drive way.

Though Jasmin and Yaida loved the adventure, Nani and Zoey had picked up on some of the information and cried as they feared to die. Reminding them of the promises made by the Creator of Heaven and earth himself, praying with them and singing songs, they fell asleep peacefully.

Do we try to get some sleep, do we stay up, how far do we go to get ready in case of disaster, how many times do we have pray for safety and protection, how do you prepare for the unknown?

...Zoey and Nani...

Though every little sound made us sit up straight in our tent we tried to sleep with the kids. When we woke up at the early day light we all laughed as we realized no earth quake had come.

You know you serve an amazing protecting God when...
We come to the office and receive word from a fellow missionary; at 12.20 last night another earth quake hit and Kigali was shaking for a while, about 300 people are believed to have died from it.
Yet we did not feel a thing nor was there any sign in our house of damage!!!

I am amazed at our Creator. This event caused me to fallin love with him even more than before! Another God-story to add to our book!

Under Attack

2008-01-30T09:27:00.000+02:00

After visiting our 24 kids in Rwaza and some very productive and pro-active meetings with various people that day, all leading to the betterment of the future of the children, we drove back to Kigila, satisfied and knowing the attack would come.

You see almost every time after we have made progress concerning our 24 children we find ourselfs under attack. Something will always happen to discourage us. We know that has we taking these children away from witchcraft, abuse and traditional medicins (is form of wicthcraft), we are taking them from a dark spiritual situation and bring them into light and freedom that Christ offers them.

Hence we know who is the one is trying to discourage us, even to the point of trying to cause us to die.

We had warned the two pastors who we network with that attck would come as usual. And sure enough, about an hour's drive before reaching Kigali the steering of our car broke. Travis was able to stop the vehivle just in time before crashing into a valley. It was a matter of less then an inch (2cm) before we would have crashed down.

The far left child is standing on the tire track of where we came to an abrubt stop.

We were in the middle of no-where. Curious children looked on while Travis and Pastor Joseph came up with a temporary fix to get the car to a place where more tools were available.
The joint had snapped and was in need of welding. With a temporary fix of some rubber string tied to keep the joint somewhat in place we drove at super slow speed to the nearest village.
The welder used to weld the joint together!
Pastor Joseph and Travis working together on a car part. We jokingly called this time a Godly Bonding time. But really that is what we thank God for.
A little "garage" behind the market place. It was yet another scary event with yet another breakdown that is called "odd". We thank God that the steering stopped where it did. We see the miracle of God's protection basically every time we go on the road. Sometimes in small ways, other times in very big ways as this day.

But really, if I would have to give up my life for the sake of those 24 children... Would I? Is it a sacrifice I am willing to make? God asked me to "bring justice to my children" as I was visiting Rwaza the very first time. Now I am the primary caregiver of the children. I did not understand what God was asking of me at first, but as I stepped out in obedience and found the truth concerning the children, their lives and the ongoing abuses I started to see what God was asking of me. Now the spiritual war is on over these children. Knowing they all know what true love is like now as they all know Jesus and have the full time care of someone who truely loves them as they are, I feel I would indeed be willing to lay down my life for these children. They are Rwanda's future. A generation of God fearing, tribe ignoring, reconciled youngsters! I thank God for the attacks. As pastor Jospeh said yesterday: where satan is not afraid, he does not attack!

P.S. We do need a new car , suitable for bad roads, very badly though!!!

Loose Life to Gain Life

2008-01-09T22:51:00.000+02:00

It has been 3 years. Who would have thought that the impact would be so big. I remember the words: ”Oh it happens all the time”, “It is a natural weeding out of the weak” and “it was nothing anyways, really, why be sad”.
Yet, my heart tells me all those words are not true. My spirit knows the Almighty holds the truth, this truth I have held on to these past 3 years.

It was a Friday afternoon when Trav had to come home early from work to take me to the hospital. Fear and peace came and went, as if they took turns those long hours of waiting in the hospital. The kind woman looked at me as she realized I too saw the reason of my urgent hospital visit. As I stared at the life less baby on the ultra sound screen I looked at the woman as if I wanted to ask her what was wrong with the machine, it is supposed to show a beating heart, not one that stands still. Tears started to flow. My mother heart was broken. My baby, it was no more.

Then the questions came; did I have too much wine during the holidays, did I eat food that damaged my baby? Did I, did I, did I…. Questions and self-accusations ran through my mind. Stopping my mind I prayed: “God, you are the Creator. I refuse to believe anything but your truth about this life you gave to me. Please give me your point of view, your truth about the life that was just so short.” Right away I heard my thoughts: ”Even before I formed you in your mothers womb I had called you to be a prophet to the nations.” These words were all it took for me to feel peace, to know that God had purposed this little being inside of me even if it meant to be so short.

We named this baby Noa, meaning Quiet Peace.
It has been amazing to see how the Lord used Noa’s short life to impact many other lives. As I would share the loss of Noa, yet the peace I felt during my grief, knowing that God desired my DNA-my child to live shortly and to be with Him so quickly to worship Him forever and ever, and how I knew that the day will come that I will hold my baby as if it had lived with me every day of my life, with people around me, many women broke down in tears. They shared the loss of their babies and the emptiness they had felt since that time as they were not able to grief their loss. The friendships and prayers following brought healing and peace to many women.
A new ministry had started. Most of it happened at my daughter’s school playground.

When the Lord used Noa to heal areas of loss and grief I had experienced as a child, I knew that I could never agree with those claiming; “nature weeds out the weak from the strong”.
My Lord, the Creator of the universe created my Noa with purpose. And the blessing from this life has impacted not only me, but many that were close to me in that time. Loosing life to gain life. I thank God for my little Noa. The day will come that I will hold you. Until then I know you are safe in the Father’s hands.
Quiet Peace is mine.

An Unforgettable Christmas... continued

2008-01-02T11:41:00.000+02:00

Lots of dancing!
Opening of the gift boxes. Cheers of joy and amazement were heard throughout the room! The buddies helped to children to understand that you do not eat lipgloss even when it smells like strawberried and that playdough is not a lotion for your skin!

Erin and Beatrice looking at the pictures of Erin's parents who are part of the church sending the boxes.
New cloths. Every child received new cloths. This boy came in a dress to the party as they had ran out of clean cloths that morning. Now he looked the way he should: a handsome young boy.

An Unforgettable Christmas... cont.

2007-12-30T22:36:00.001+02:00

These children were looking like VIP's in their new outfits, and they knew it!

Thank you Julie and your team that came to Rwanda earlier this year and blessed us with cloths for the children!

The Team helping us with the children were such a blessing to us and the kids! Thanks Guys!

After watching a slide show about Jesus' life and why we need him, we ministered to all the children. All of them gave their lifes to Jesus, including our 5 service staff that work with the children!

An Unforgettable Christmas... continued.

2007-12-29T10:15:00.000+02:00

After much more singing and dancing a buffet was ready for the children. Fish, French Fries, Meat, vegetables, soup and soda's as much as they wanted! These children of the King ate a royal meal! Just as they deserve!

The children had no space in their tummies left, they all ate so much. Tired but happy they waved goodbye as the bus brought them back to Rwaza. They sang all the way home:"Come to Rwaza and see, see the good things that are happening to us, come...."

Still hearing their shouts of joy, their laughter and songs in my head we drove back home also. It has been a a very long, but unforgettable day!

Those who have bought SoZo Bags; this party was made possible because of you! Thank You!

Rest at Kumbya 1

2007-12-02T08:59:00.001+02:00

The day after our break down we tried again. This time we succeeded. W took the necessary coffe breaks and had a beautiful drive to Kumbya. Coffee break in Butare at the national museum.The cabin we rented has no running water nor electricity. The nights were cold, a good excuse to start a fire and lite many candles.

Rest at Kumbya 2

2007-12-02T08:41:00.000+02:00

When the rain went we quickly headed out to the beach area and enjoy the sun. We relealized we were all exhausted and needed lots of sleep.

Our 12 hour breakdown

2007-12-02T08:13:00.000+02:00

When I think of a vacation or break, I think of a smooth transition from home to the place of destination. With snack in the car, excited chatter from the kids, regular stops for little ones so they can get rid of their energy.... When this does not happen it definately crashes the party! Here some pictures of our 12 hour breakdown in the midle of nowhere a good 2 hours outside of Kigali.

In order to get to the broken waterpump many parts were taken out.
The attraction for the local community.

We would still have drive another 4 hours to our destination part of which would be through Nyungwe rainforest where militia is known to still be hiding. We had no choice but to return to Kigali where exactly at midnight we entered our home.

You Gotta Love it!

2007-10-09T19:51:00.000+02:00

Some things become so common until you bring someone with you into this common thing who is not used to it and reminds you of how it goes where you are from! This happened to me last week as I took my friends Ruben and Christine to a local market. Mind you, this is a very nice and clean one, actually much nocer than the one I go to for clothing shopping. Have a peak at the market and great items you can get here. A considerably clean butcher has been at work.

Flour.Clothing and African material section
One of the many seamstresses awaiting a job Souveria's or cooking pots, any size you need!
And even if you need to buy bulk... Welcome to the Kimironko market. The place I enjoy hanging out. Great Kinyarwandan practice grounds and perfect people watching entertainment. I love the place! But I guess Christine is right, it is a bit much to have to negotiate about even a bag of flour!

Friends and Rwaza

2007-10-09T07:37:00.000+02:00

Ishimwe, almost 2. Found abandonend on the Rwaza compound.

You know, when other catch your vision and come along side you... it is awesome.

We were blessed with a team from Windham, New Hempsire who brought an amazing amount of blessings for the children in Rwaza. From toys and crayons to t-shirts and crafts. The children had so much fun getting their nails done, making their caps and playing soccer. We had brought food as usual and the team had bought extra beans and rice! It was a true party! Thanks friends from NH, you blessed not just the kids, but also us as you have come along side us and catch on to our vision! God bless you for your love for the children!

General Life

2007-10-09T06:27:00.000+02:00

Just a few shots of images and places part of our day to day life.

People are always everywhere, carying water, fruit and other items on their heads. In the villages people sometimes have to walk more than an hour to get some decent water. Those who have bikes are able to transport larger amounts and earning some money as water fetchers. It is rainy season again. This time we are dry inside the house and do not have to move our furniture around as we did last season. Never the less the rains come so heavy that the road (the one below is right by our home) turn into rivers. This was after 5 minutes of rain!

But when the clouds part... Beautiful Sunshine...

"My Children"

2007-09-23T07:54:00.000+02:00

It is always with excitement and joy that I prepare to visit "my children". Yes the 21 orphans in Rwaza, have captured my heart. They have called me "mami" for awhile, everytime it cut through my heart when they would say the word. I tried to protect my heart and not get to attached to these children. I tried to ignore the mother in me screaming at me to release my heart to love them.

The words of my teachers go through my head; "you should never become too attached to those who need your counsil and help, it dilutes your professional observations and diagnosis". Studies have proven that children who received motherly love develop better in over all life and will have healthier families of their own. There are the statistics of those who have grown up under institutional care and the lack of motherly love, they scare me. And I realize that I cannot get attached enough to these children. They need my motherly love, I might be one of the only mother who can give it to them on a consistant basis. They need my heart to be open for them. They need me to teach them the things only a mother can teach. It hurts because I am fully aware of the sufferings these children endure. The lack of basic love, care and food. My heart aches, it would be so easy to remain detached, but I made the choice, my heart adopted 21 children.It was a special day today as we had received care-bears from ...... The children in the vacation bible school had made these bears with the my Rwaza children in mind. Little notes were placed in a pouch on the bear speaking of Jesus his love for the child and a small note from the child who had carefully made the bear. My kids could not comprehend that American children would care for them to make such bears! They clapped for joy and excitement when they realized they are known, they matter and other children pray for them!

Nani and Zoey gave all children a bear. Seeing their servant hearts without any jealousy or envy of the blessing they gave away blessed me all the more!
"I will sleep with my bear tonight 11 year old Emmanuel exclaimed. My note came from Alex, can you send him my photo, I love him so much, you must tell him thank you from me, 14 year old Gilbert was so sweet and excited to know that someone loves him!
Little Otis, 4 yrs old is always playing with a knife. He is such a tough boy, a fighter for sure, yet he embraced his bear and did not let go. You see, boys like him need mothers who love them, even if that means a knife in one hand and a bear in the other.

Though there was great joy, lunch made me wanna cry. Sweet potatos with may be 15 beans per child... A good filler, but no nutrition. The children were sure glad to see the sambosa's (big meat filled dumplings) and banana's. For dinner we had brought them more banana's and eggs.
Nani and Zoey are serving the children banana's.
My noughty daughters made a little fire with some of their friends. It cracks me up to see children are chidren all over the globe. They all do the same things and all have this noughty side to them!Ishimwe, this precious girl never smiled or laughed, today she did not stop laughing. She was so joyful!Julia and Sam, our friends from the U.K. came along for the day. I felt proud to show off my children to them. It was such a joyful day. Surprised we realized we'd better jump in the car and head back to Kigali to make it before dark. My children, that is who they are, they will be in my heart forver!

Happy Birthday Nani!

2007-09-17T08:49:00.000+02:00

Yes it is a cliche; they are growing up too fast! But you know, though a cliche, it rings complete truth to me! It truly is amazing, the first words, first steps, first day of school, first loose tooth... Yet it seems there is one thing that remains the same through it all. The day she was born an overwhelming feeling of responsability overtook me, knowing this was my flesh and blood, this tiny baby overwhelmed me with her presence. This feeling of responsability has never left me, not a single minute. As I watch my Nani blow out 8 candles I am all to aware of this protective, responsability emotion and again I feel it overtakes me.

Nani's birthday party was fun. Pizza, play and movie. I just cannot help but to enjoy the colorful display of children in this photo. The nationalities in this photo: South-African, Ugandan, American, Dutch, Russian, U.K. (England) and Rwandan.

The set up of a little home-movie-theathre was a big succes. 5 girls spend the night after watching 2 movies and having loads of candy, surpsingly they all slept by 10.30 pm and didn't come out of bed until 7 am. The next morning, American pancakes and home made syrup for breakfast!

Happy Birthday Nani!

1998-2007

2007-09-09T06:25:00.000+02:00

Remember... 9 years ago around this time we were having lunch with our wedding guests... Remember... Around this time we were at City Hall... Remember, remember, remember.

Happy memmories filled our day as we revisited our wedding day. We thought of all the people that were part of this special day. We thought of our emotions, thoughts and desires for our "Marraige-carreer". And concluded that we are truly amazed at what we have been through, what we have experienced and how we have grown to become who we are today.

We had decided to go on a date to celebrate today. As a lack of things o do in Kigali we wanted to go for a nice workout then dinner at Indian Khazana. After our workout Travis looked at me and said; "Hey I have a surprise" And he showed me the keycard to a hotelroom. Surprised he told me how many of our friends in Kigali had put their money together to bless us with this gift! In the room was a beautiful bouquet of roses and a note from all our friends. We just cried as we wondered what do they see in us that they would bless us like this. They had the care for our kids completely covered and told us to come back whenever... We watched CNN, (we had not seen any world news in over 2 years!) and concluded that we really do not miss anything in the world, the same old news items as always, just with different people. We really enjoyed ourselfs and woke up in the morning because we wanted to, not because we had to! This was after all our first night away from all our children in over 2,5 years!

Thank you Tupo, Ali & Joel, Jean, Lisa & Jeff, Tineke, Shannon, Meredith, Adriaan & Lisette. You guys have no idea how much you all mean to us. Thank you for being our friends!

another link

2007-09-06T17:11:00.001+02:00

Dear freinds,

At www.AstridInRwanda.hyves.nl you can read adittional info on my life and ministry in DUTCH !!! This blog also shows up on the page for easy access. There are additional photos when you click on the photo album link. Enjoy!

Lieve vrienden.

Op www.AstridInRwanda.hyves.nl kan je in het nederlands op de hoogte bijven van het rijlen en zeilen van mijn leven, gezin en ministry. De weblogs zoals je je gewend bent staan er ook in het engels op. Er zijn extra photos in de foto albums op de site. Veel lees plezier en laat effe een berichtje achter!

Food for Rwaza

2007-08-23T23:16:00.000+02:00

Today was such a special day...

Loaded with 50 kilo's (80lbs) of beans, 50kilo's (80lbs) of rice, 25 kilo's (40lbs) of carrots and 10kilo's (18lbs) of onions, a soccer ball, biscuits and meat, I drove up the tiny road to the almost top of the mountain, the home of the Rwaza orphans.

Mama Deo was in tears when I showed her all the food we brought as she humbly shared how they are just preparing the last food they had and they even cooked the leafs of the cabbage ( a part normally not eaten) just to add some "greens" to the meal.

She walked around telling all the children: tonight we have meat with dinner!! Many cheers were heard and mama Deo explained that it has been many many months since they had last eaten a piece of meat...

All of you who have been praying and giving to this place... thank you so much! If you could have been there today... the joys expressed about the meat and general food was just amazing! You are inpacting lifes in a very deep way! thank you.

It was so much fun to play with the kids. Rough play with the boys and kuddling and tickeling with the litteler ones. It was relaxed and the children expressed how comfortable they had become with us. Below is Meredith, a friend from Australia with a six month Salvation Army commitment to Rwanda.

The last food.
Thank you for the soap!

Mama Deo has found four people to be employed and to help with the care of the children as they take a big part of the practical duties on themselves. Sadly enough we learned that people have stolen the new soccerballs and other new cloths and toys, so we are going to find them a day and night guard to ensure the safety and protection of the children and all their belongings. Want to help with that?

Many good tings are happening in and with Rwaza. The kids are amazing and so well mannered. And mama Deo is just amazing! God bless and keep her!

Back to Kibuye

2007-08-19T21:31:00.000+02:00

This piece of land that one day will be the home of SoZo Minstries Africa's Heaven Touching Earth. The orphan village with 256 orphans mothered bu 32 widows... Every time we go here I can hear the sounds of those children playing. The dinner bell sounding and the silence before the dinner prayer. Cows came down the hill and the corner of the property is still the local boat-stop for pick ups and drop-offs. I imagine the boats filled with white and black people who return from the main harbor with soda-pop for special events. I see children jumping from a dock that stretches into the water. Nani and Zoey already made a friend on the land. They played and swam in the lake.
The peace and calm of the place is just amazing. The beauty stunning. One day...

We brought our friends Aaron and Kendra to see the place and they too could see it... Hundreds of children on their face worshipping Jesus. Living in peace and love with themself and each other. Widows that found purpose in life as they love and mother the children. People from all over the globe coming to help and equip the community around and love the children...Keep praying for Heaven Touching Earth. God is on the move, what started with a God given vision will end with a place beaming of Life, full of Jesus and amazing testimonies about our God.

Hope in Rwaza 1

2007-08-13T11:23:00.000+02:00

We drove 2 hours in expectation and hope to get to hear Mama Deo's story. Why does a 70 year old nun run an orphanage all by herself. Where is the church, do they help? WHo is responsible, why are there nice buildings yet no food for the children. What is the story? We listened as Mama Deo shared how during the genocide she would walk through the dead bodies picking up the children that were sitting in shock next to their dead parents. How even she had to run and hide with the children she cared for and miraculously survived. Her vision to provide wholeness for the children... wow... She gave up a comfortable life in the convent (place where catholic nuns live) for a live of extreme poverty with the children she so selflessly loves.

(Picture above)
One of the young girls (about 8) taking care of one of the litteler ones. Mama Deo is all by herself in the care of her children. She loves them so much, it is so obvious the children love her too and they all group around her as soon as she sits down. They know she makes great sacrifices out of her love for them. She is so bussy that the children are left to take care of themselves.
Listening to Mama Deo's story we had to hold back the tears as we realized her desire for wholeness and our desire for wholeness. This 70 year old catholic nun has the same vision for the orphans of Rwaza as us, as couple in their 30's coming from wealthy western nations.

Mama Deo showed us the little plot of land she bought for cultivation. Emmanuel proudly shows me the milk cow they have.

Aaron and Kendra. Friends of ours that are visiting us. Aaron also designed and keeps up our website.

Hope in Rwaza 2

2007-08-13T00:24:00.000+02:00

Here is the Rwaza clan! Mama Deo is the old woman with the white head cover. The two big girls (top right) are from the older orphanage Mama Deo runs.

As soon as we arrived at Rwaza the children asked for Nani. Excited she came they showed her their fingernails. And yes, Nani cam prepared and faithfully painted all their toes and nails.
This little guy sat on my lap for awhile. I kept stroking his arms and face within a few minutes he was in a deep sleep.
This boy was sitting on a rock with his head down. I asked him what was wrong and he started to cry. He had a headache he said. Trav and I prayed for the boy who by then just lost it. Travis picked him up and held him for a while, explaining that crying is ok. Mama Deo who listened in agreed. From that moment the boy was unseperable from Trav. A boy in need of a father...

Being with these great children and seeing their desire for love, attention and care. The need for physical affirmation and joy. To let the emotions loose. All of this makes me thank the Lord more and more for His words: " I will not leave you as orphans, but I will come to you." (John 14:19)

At the end of the day we knew God called us to this place to assist this amazing woman. We will do whatever we can as a ministry to help Mama-Deo in her vision for wholeness for these wonderful children, her children, as she proudly calls them.

Thanks to the support of many of you we are able to employ four people for cultivation, animal care, laundry and cleaning! Mama Deo was very excited with this news. Hope came in the hearts of many at Rwaza Orphanage today.

Kumbya 1 Missionary retreat

2007-08-09T06:33:00.001+02:00

Kumbya is a little peninsula in the south-western corner of Rwanda. A peninsula that has been used for missionary retreat since the 1950's. A beatiful place at Lake Kivu.
We went for a 9 day missionary retreat. We saw many of our missionary friends there and made many new ones. Jim Copeland, a former Promise Keeper leader spoke to us on Shepherd Leadership and seriously challenges all of our leadership styles based on biblical principals. We had times of worship, VBS for the big girls and lots of time for games and lake side fun.
I did not realize how tired I was until people around me asked if I was ok 'cause I didn't look all that good... scary when that happens. It took about two days before we all had settled and rest started to enter all of our lives. Though it was not per se a relaxing time (really what would that look like with little children) it was a good time. I did worship with my friends and just enjoyed being there. No agenda, no obligations. Travis and I were asked to share our testimony. During the course of the week many people came and thanked us for re-fireing their vision for Rwanda and their heart for the lost.
We drove through the Nyangwe forest. A rainforest with incredible beauty. Nani counted 27 monkeys on the way through it. Everywhere we went military marched the roads keeping the area protected from the malitia that is still believed to be hiding in this thick forest.
Our camp site. We used our tent (thanks Corrie & Daniel & Fam.) which was big enough for all of us to sleep in. We also had a grass hut build for shade and storage. We came prepared with tarp as we heard stories of people beig washed out of their huts last year.Up until about the 1950's these grass huts were the houses of many Rwandans. Even the King would live in a grass hut, though much bigger and fancier, but with the same concept. We were surpised how nicely cool it stayed inside during the hot hours of the day. It was quite the experience!

Kumbya 2

2007-08-09T06:12:00.000+02:00

Jasmin and Yaida
Most of our afternoons were spent at the beach by the Lake, to great enjoyment of all the girls. There were also movie nights with popcorn!!! at the beach and the Vacation Bibleschool would do slip and slides there also. It was such a fun time!

Nani and Zoey during skit night.

We laughed so hard that night! People who are normally reserved and seem very concervative in their thinking came up with skits about the "missionary long drop training" now the long drop discibes the toilets and the training was a demonstration of how to aim properly and what not to do!

Others wrote songs inspired by the beauty of Kumbya and after a sweet and touching introduction started their song with the skreetching sound of the crows. We jumped from our chairs only to roll on the floor in laughter!

Kumbya 3

2007-08-09T06:00:00.000+02:00

Jasmin and teacher Amanda

Nani
Nani and Zoey with some of their friends

Zoey and her new friend Danny from Tanzania.

And off we went, back to Kigali.

We thank the Lord for the new friendships build, the fun times we all had, the teaching and the encouragement we all received from this week. Thank you to all who helped us with finances and to all who worked so hard at Kumbya and blessing us in so many ways!

Yaida has hair!!

2007-07-27T23:02:00.000+02:00

Yaida has hair now!!

It took about four hours to get all the brades in her hair. In the picture Isabelle (our househelp) is holding Yaida while Herriet does the brades. Yaida did great considering the amount of time!

Yaya loved her hair and keeps telling us how pretty she is, as if we did not know yet! In just a week she will be 18 months old. Wow time goes fast. She is such a cutie and soooo funny.

I just had to show her off to you all. I pray soon it will be face to face!

Rwaza Orphanage 1

2007-07-22T17:10:00.000+02:00

Two cars filled with boxes and a total of 9 people, representing 4 continents, drove off the main road heading for a hidden orphanage known by very few. The surroundings were gorgeous, close by the volcano's in the northern province. The facility looked nice, until we looked inside the rooms... piles of dirty cloths, little puddles of urine, garbage and wasps were everywhere. Children with bloated bellies, running noses and open wounds.

Even the cows were a lot skinnier then they should be. It was a sad sight. Yet the children were so excited to see us all. Hand clap games, soccer matches (with the new balls), coloring (on the new paper and crayons) and just receiving a hug were the steady scene during our day long visit with these children.

The amazing skill of children; making friends...

Nani and Grace were instant friends. Nani made it her mission to paint every child's finger and toe nails. They just loved it! And so did Nani, my little missionary. The location of her beauty salon? A pile of urine smelling mattresses...

Judging by the photos you might think that the children have what they need. And yes to some extend I would agree. The buildings are great, they have nice beds, even mattresses, they even have some cloths. I was confused by what I saw. Tineke and I went to the convent and asked some questions. Church politics is the best way to describe the root of the problem. Funds are not given to the orphanage... It is a very sensitive issue... we were told. When asked if it was right that the children had to go without food and live in filthy circumstances the answer was not one of resolution of the problem.

The compound has land for cultivation, there are cows and pigs for manure and reproduction(an income generating activity) there are even chicken coupes, just no chickens.

To hire two people to cultivate and take care of the animals, feed them and have proper tools it would cost about $50 per month. The result would be fresh foods, milk and eggs, income generating possibilities and just a healthy diet for the children. The guarantee that they do not go to bed with an empty stomach.

For only $75 per month additional foods, supplementing what cannot be home grown, can be bought and would cover basic medical attention needs. For $150 per month all of these children can all have the chance to a healthy and basic needs covering life. SoZo Ministries has fallen in love with the children and deeply touched by the need of the Rwaza orphanage. We are desiring to help any way we can. You will definitely see more photos of these sweet children in the future.

Rwaza Orphanage 2

2007-07-22T16:31:00.000+02:00

While Tineke and I brought some children to the nearby clinic, others scrubbed the halls with bleach. Some of the bigger children even helped! The sleepig hall was very stinky. After it was scrubbed, the mattresses aired and the sheets washed to room smelled clean to great delight of one of the sisters assisting, who came running to us when we arrived telling us to come and see the sleeping hall!
Some of us put our money together to buy basins, buckets, cleaning supplies, soap, laundry soap and food for the orphanage. There was not even a broom to be found on the compound... The children werechecking out the big buckets.
Dirty laundry. We gathered about 4 big piles from the childrens sleeping hall. We paid some people from the community to do the laundry. The orphange cannot afford laundry soap, nor the people to do the laundry, so it just does not happen... It would only cost $25 per month to hire one person to do laundry and to have sufficient laundry soap. It would prefend serious deseases among the children and gives a job opportunity to someone in the community.

Almost all the children and all of us who came to serve and help. It was surprise time. Soda's and new cloths, shoes, toys and a real meal!

Rwaza Orphanage 3

2007-07-22T16:15:00.000+02:00

Nani's middlename is Grace. Here she poses with her new friend Grace. They told every listening ear they were sisters.

The more time I spent with people from all tribes and nations, rich and poor, respected and disowned, they are really all the same. I know we all know this, but ... do we really? Why do we treat the poor in our society different from the leaders we serve under? Can we be like the children? Do you dare to take the time to sit and listen to the troubles of a homeless person in your area as you would listen and take time for the fellow student, your collegue or aquantance from your area of social connection with whom you have "a connection" though you don't know him/her? Really, why do we do this? Nani played on a pile of stinky, urine smelling mattresses, waving my disapproval her sitting on them away with a: "But mom, I will take a shower when we get home..." In other words, come on, who cares! Do you care?

Shining medals gave the children a victory feeling. They have been disowned by many, but are accepted and loved by their creator. They are true winners! I was able to bring a new outfit for every child, including new shoes!
It was not easy for Nani to give away the dress she used to love so much. Yet to see the smile and love in her eyes when she gives it away... I know she will receive blessings from the Lord as she gives away with so much joy! It blessed my mother heart to see my daughter truly understanding the joy of giving. Nani I pray you will never lack anything as you continue to bless so many out of the blessings you have received.

This little girl is very sick. Her poor nose was bleeding from all the snot and crust. Her caugh was concerning. She had a dirty little dress on. When I had given her new cloths and shoes she wore them proudly. Thank you to all of who who keep sending nice cloths and shoes! The children were so excited!!

Before and After

We will be back many more times ensuring church politics will be set aside for the sake of these wonderful children, their future and their relationship with their Creator!

This orphanage does not receive any financial help. The children are only eating sweet potatoes. There is no money for docter check ups, other foods not even for laundry soap. If you want to donate funds specifically for the children of the Rwaza orphange you can click on this link www.SoZoMinistriesAfrica.org and go to "make a donation". Specify it is for Rwaza Orphanage and we will make sure your money gets there.

You are qualified

2007-07-02T10:23:00.000+02:00

Have you even wondered how in the world you could impact people with your skill? Do you find your heart drawn to foreign countries and maybe even mission but you feel you have asolutely nothing to offer?

Meet my friend Debbie.

Nani, Debbie & Zoey

Debbie is a professional hairstylist from the Netherlands with 9 years of experience in her profession. She works in a modern saloon and trains others in the latest hair styles. Last year we met as we organized some outreaches for the short team missions team Debbie was in. She had fallen in love with Rwanda. When I learned of her profession I mentioned how there is no-one in RWanda who knows how to succesfuly cut the hair of white people. Why wouldn't she come and open a saloon here. It could be a mission field on it's own.

Not realizing the impact these words had made, Debbie emailed and asked if she could come and cut hair for "a good cause". While helping her set it all up she mentioned the proceeds would be for SoZo Ministries Africa!

Here we are 50+ haircuts and about 15 trainings hours later...

Some of the responses of people:

Dear Astrid, Please thank Debbie again for such a good haircut. I do think it makes me look a lot younger and at my age that's great. :)

Thanks again to Debbie for her great act of service to those of us here in Rwanda! Every morning when I look at my hair in the mirror I think about how grateful I am to have a decent haircut again! Doesn’t she want to come back about every 8 weeks?

Some remarked how they felt spiritually empowered as they broke the cycle of self-neglect by receiving a haircut. Other said how they just do not sit still and enjoy something, but now they did. Others felt beautiful again and younger, others has husband ask them to go out for the night, something they had not done for a long time.

If you ever wonder what you can do with your skill in the mission field or in a foreign nation... think about Debbie. She could not have foreseen that her hands would bless so many. That her education would be so practical in the heart of Africa. Do not limit yourself, do not think you have nothing to offer. It is not necessary to have a Phd in one thing or the other. The impact you can make in the lives of others requires of you to be yourself. You are qualified!

Relief and joy of a nice look.

Zoey went short!

Hope Kwisera

2007-06-13T15:02:00.000+02:00

Remember my blog about Tatiana, the woman of faith who was robbed of everything... but God?

Tatiana gave birth to a bautiful baby girl about 10 days ago. yes girl! The docters had the gender and due date wrong, but here she is.

When I met Tatiana about two months back, she had no hope, no future, no life. She refers to the stage I found her in as her animal stage. She wanted to die as she was desperate and overwhelmed with he poverty she found herself in. She used to live a middle class life style as the result of her succesful boutique. She was robbed off all she had by her husband to be, leaving her with no option but to find a shack to live in with no income. All she had was herself and God. She prayed every day for a change in her situation, but abandoned by friends and family she had lost convidence. Yet she trusted God would act on her behalf.

The day I walked into her small room, she saw answered prayer. She has prayed for me daily since then, she said today. And there has not been a day Tatiana has not been in my mind.

She cried today as she went through the boxes and bags of clothing for her and the baby and lots of food. Over and over she said; God be praised.... I am speech less... She thanks all the people who have prayed and send items with her in mind. It blessed her so much!

Someone has offered funds for her to be employed by us. With that a lasting answer has come for her provision. She was overjoyed with the news of a job and kept hugging me saying; Now I will be strong again.

KWISERA, Hope.

Tatiana made me speechless today as she told me somthing today that is hard to fathom. She said; this child is yours. I give it to you. Where ever you want to sent her she shall go and whatever you want to do with her I agree. You have been a mother to me, so now this child is yours...

You need to know that these are not just nice words, this is now a responsability I have. The expectation is that I care for Hope as if she would be mine. Wow...

Tatiana has asked me to name her baby. I had prayed and thought about a name and Tatiana's testimony said it all: Hope. Kwisera means Trust, it is the name she gave, and Kwisera will be the last name. Hope will be my contribution. I guess I became mother again today. What an opportunity. What a ministry.

Discipleship Training School in Rwanda

2007-06-11T20:46:00.000+02:00

Didier, Jessica, Florah, Elis, Noel (from top row, left to right)

Chantel, Eric, me, Peter, Kim

Laura

Fufo, ?, Alfred

15 hours of teaching on one subject may get long, winded and boring. But when God shows up..... Wow!

My friend Elis from Brasil asked me to teach on the character and nature of God for a whole week in the Discipleship training school (DTS) from Youth with a mission (YWAM). This is the school and organization that the Lord used to get Trav and I together and where both of us were truly "baptized" into missions.

The class of 10 students, 6 Rwandese, one Burundian, A Korean, and two north americans were just wonderful. They desired to learn and "ate" up the words I spoke.

On Friday after the last teaching session we had a time of ministry. And wow! God showed up. The Lord touched some of the young orphaned girls and revealed himself to them, causing them to go from tears and screams of pain to dancing through the classroom with joy! A young man had lost his father during the war and the Lord revealed His father heart to him. Wow. What was to happen in 10 minutes lasted 2 hours. The Lord did amazing things. I love it when he shows up.

Please pray for this class. Many of them have been through severe trauma's in their lives, yet they survived and are now desperate for the Lord. They are an amazing class. I am looking forward to August when I get to be with them and teach them again. Pray that in the eman time the Lord will reveal himself more and more to them.

6 Years old!

2007-05-19T23:24:00.000+02:00

Excited and shy she cam into the living room, after all it was time to open her presents. A quiet "wow" broke the silence. Zoey was completely speechless when she saw the Polly Pocket house. Gently she touched it and climbed on the table to get a closer look. Another "wow". She then gave her big sister specific instructions; Only watching, NO touching!

Zoey wanted her best friends to celebrate her birthday with her. From the left to right are: Casey, Nani, Rebecca and Ruth. It was a sleepover birthday party, so much fun!
Happy Birthday to you!

6 Years old! continued

2007-05-19T23:20:00.000+02:00

Rainy season in Rwanda did not limit our joy. Zoey took her friends to a Mexican restaurant close by our house. Though the playground was muddy, the girls played African style. When walking back it was dark already and we made a long train singing: "chooc-a-chooc-a-yack-yack" as we were all slipping and sliding on the road.

The girls soaked in the bath and were ready to wind down with a movie in the living room. Popcorn (popped at a friends house who has a microwave) made for a special treat.

The next morning; the girls got up with the roosters and played all morning, only to completely crash in the afternoon. It was a fun time though. Zoey had lots of fun and so did the other children.

Surprise Surprise !

2007-05-17T14:23:00.000+02:00

Yes I did it again. I build another house. This time it is a mall: Pocket Plaza and an appartment building. Though Kigali is developping rapidly, paying $10 for a Barbie the quality of those from the dollar store is still not in my budget. So what choice is left...

Zoey is turning 6 tomorrow. She once mentioned how she would like Polly Pocket house. After all I made Nani a Barbie house for her birthday. Hmmm..... Good point. Especially as the girls will have their own rooms in the hew house we will be moving into soon. I thought I would give it another try.

I am impressed I must humbly admit. I never thought that I could work out the ideas and imaginary rooms I saw in my head.

The elevator at the front of Pocket Plaza will bring Polly Pocket from the parking garage to the shoe store, clothing boutique or the roof level where she can relax at the pool side.

At the left building: Coffee shop with terras and two studio apprtments and a helicoptor landing spot on the roof. The mall has the garage, shoe store and boutique with the pool on the roof.Polly and her friends enjoying a cup of coffee.

Surprise Surprise! continued

2007-05-17T12:05:00.000+02:00

By elevator Polly and her friends can come all the way to the roof to relax at the pool.

The helicoptor car can land on it's designated helicoptor landing spot.

Steps lead Polly, Pia and their friends to the studio appartments above the coffe shop.

The latest fashion displayed in this way hip store or should I say boutique?

Looking at this house I wonder why I am such a sucker for building these things. Remember Nani's barbie house back in September? I thought I would have learned my lessons then. The wood here is wet and crooked. I do not have he right tools, nor any real skill nor any example to go off. Just my imagination.

I must give a lot of credit to Jenni who send me a hot glue gun, felt and loads of other craft items. Thanks Jenni, without these items I would not have been able to make this house. Tomorrow is the big day. Zoey will be 6! Will she like it? Does she have a clue what happened behind the closed door of our guestroom during the past two weeks? Tomorrow we'll know. This time I am serious... Never again such a project!

It's a Baby Girl 1.

2007-05-11T22:37:00.000+02:00

Here she is a cute baby girl, Born on Tuesday May 8th to our friends Uwimana and Denise.We went to visit them in their house out in the village today. The name of the baby will be announced during a naming ceremony in a week. We brought them gifts from both cultures. In RWanda the woman gets the Nido powdermilk to help with her own milk production... We also gave her and the baby lots of cloths.
Jasmin and Yaida loved the baby and gave her many kisses and empty bottle caps from the soda's we shared with Uwi and Denise.
Denise and the baby. It is great to celebrate life and birth in a time of sadness. I think this baby girl will look a lot like her mama. Such a princess.

It's a girl 2.

2007-05-11T15:16:00.000+02:00

New cloths for Furaha. She was so excited about her new shoes she had to go outside and show them off right away.
I am always amazwd at the generosity of the poor. Uwi and Denise had a big Rwandan meal for us and blessed us with lots of plantines (Trav and Uwi carry them). It is amazing to me, the riches of the Rwandan culture. The friendship and relationship as priority and the commitment and joy that comes from it.

Queens Day - Koninginnedag

2007-05-10T19:31:00.000+02:00

Over 55 kids and at least the same amount of adults spent last Saturday in my backyard. April 30th marks the birthday of my queen. The Queen of The Netherlands; Beatrix.

Many Dutch and Belgiums living in Rwanda came with their children to celebrate this event.

Our oversized compound and even the color of our house were perfect for the occasion.

Orange is the last name of the Royal Dutch Family, explaining that though our flags colors are red-white-blue, we dress orange for special national events.

Nani is playing the game "bottle-peeing" an all time favorite. Zoey was very competitive to make her team win and acted like a pro on the cow-milking game.

Queens Day - Koninginnedag 2.

2007-05-10T19:29:00.000+02:00

The party was complete with Poffertjes, Kroketten and Erwtensoep! It was great to be in such a Dutch environment for a day.

It was a day with lots of fun, food and people. But the great thing about hosting Dutch people is that they take full responsability in cleaning up after themselfs! It made me feel blessed!

Zoey's team won by the way, good job Zoey! Happy Birthday BEA!!

Family Picture

2007-05-10T19:19:00.000+02:00

Easter 2007.

Nani & Zoey (7,5 and almost 6 years old)

Us... well, we're as young as we feel... right?

Yaida and Jasmin both 14 months.

Mourning, Trauma and Dispair

2007-04-12T19:29:00.000+02:00

Saturday April 7th at Amahoro Stadium in Kigali

Thousands of people had gathered in the stadium for the opening of the week of mourning. Now that Rwanda is my country I came to express my support to all who were grieving.

When I entered the stadium I felt a heavy depression come upon me. I did my best to stay above it as I tried to have light hearted conversations with those around me. But it just wasn't right. The atmosphere was sorrowful. More and more people came. Some had red eyes from crying others sunglasses on though it was early evening. The feeling of sadness and depression became stronger with the minute.

The ceremony started with silence for those who had died during the genocide and the years of killing prior to the 1994 outburst. It was an eary silence.

Ministers and other leaders of Rwanda lit their candles and walked a silent walk on the tracks. I recognized some faces and felt a glimpse of hope knowing there would at least be some people I could share this experience with.

A man had been asked to share his testimony of survival. He was in Kibuye during the genocide and shared how he had been beaten severely then nailed on a cross, then with cross and all placed in a fire, left to die. When he shared these details all around me people who had been crying silently started screaming. Some jumped up and looked as if they were fighting, screaming like I had never heard before. The more details on what the man had been through he shared the more people started screaming and crying hysterically.

Men who stiffened up and just fell to the ground, women who were kicking and screaming and carried off. Others who seemed to gain control over their tears then in a sudden moment completely losing it and yelling things while acting hysterically.

My heart ripped inside me, the screams were unbearable, they cut through anything. While tears were streaming down my face I whispered; "Jesus, oh Jesus, have mercy, come and heal, come and heal, come and heal". There would be moments of calm and quiet followed by outbursts of screaming and other post traumatic manifestations. The lady sitting next to me cried quietly and I found myself snuggled up to her holding hands as the night progressed.

This whole week as been of a week of weeping. As our friends come and share their stories there is nothing I can do, but sit and cry with them. The screams are still in my head, I wonder if they will ever go. The stories of my friends, to horrendous to repeat are written in my heart.

The Lord gently reminded me of the reason he brought me and my family to Rwanda; to bring wholeness... This experience in the stadium has enlarged my heart even more and stretched my compassion for the wounded and lost beyond my imagination.

There are very few doing trauma relief in this nation, we have the tools but need to train and equip the willing. When my friend tells me that when she hears a knock on a door she freezes because someone might want to be there ready to rape her or take her to be killed, when my other friend walks on the streets of Kigali and has regular flashbacks of the days when there were roadblocks at the places he sets foot, roadblocks made of dead people, his people, his family members....

Are you willing to help us get all the equipment we need to start training Rwandans who the lord has set free to lead their own people into wholeness from their trauma? We need a power point projector, training materials and some documentation copied. Please contact me at Astrid@SoZoMinistriesAfrica.org if you can help!

Forever 29

2007-04-06T07:22:00.000+02:00

Can you believe it, I am still 29... It's ok I don't believe it either.

It was my birthday a few days back and a very special one. We took Nani and Zoey and went for a delicious breakfast to a 5 star hotel in Kigali. The girls fell from one amazement to another, starting after driving into the parking lot. Wow they have a fountain and it works! The one yelled. Wow and they have cool lights outside the other noticed. When we went in I felt highly embarrassed. Both Nani and Zoey stopped in the center of the lobby just in pure delighted amazement of the beauty of the place. Look at all that tile, so shiny... Wow and they have real furniture Zoey said will jumping in a very beautiful lether chair... And a real piano, Nani noticed. When we entered the restaurant it was all ooh and aah... Both girls sat down real proper with the napkin in their laps and straight backs. Yes they wanted coffee please when asked what to drink. When they saw coco puff cereal, cheeses and BACON, they just could not control themselves. They were jumping with excitement!

After a wonderful breakfast we took the girls to the new coffee place in the city. Again this created many oohs and aahs. I looked at Zoey and noticed her standing in the middle of the room. Her foot slowly slipped out of her flip flop and unto the floor, her toes started to wiggle. With twinkles in her eyes she said; Naan, feel this!" while bumping her big sister with her elbow. Both of them were standing there, in the middle of the store without shoes enjoying carpet...

This was such a fun time, what a great birthday! Thanks Trav for saying it was mandatory for us to celebrate this day! I love you.

I believe...

2007-03-30T10:42:00.000+02:00

Another one of those needs... Those where my thoughts after my Rwandan friend asked me to help a single woman about to give birth.

I prayed and asked God if I were to take any responsability for this need. Before I knew it I went through the boxes with baby cloths, diapers and receiving blankets. I looked in my closet to see if I had any cloths I did not favor and knew to be better used by a woman in need. On top of that the Lord impressed on me to add nailpolish and lipgloss. I searched my kitchen and ended up with a nice amount of food.

Honestly I was suprised at my response for I had not heard God say a yes or no about this particular need but yet an urge to go visit this woman and help with what I had.

I walk through some back ally's into an area that smells horrendous, open sewage, garbage, half dressed children. Yet this place is only a 5 minute drive from my home. ( see photo below)I enter a little corridor and stand face to face with a beautiful young woman. Obviously pregnant she comes and greets me. We enter her home; a small room with a bed and some chairs. I notice an old radio in a corner and a Kinyarwandan bible next to it. The walls are cracked and the only tiny window in the room barely gives enough light to see anything. (the very back area of this house is where Tatiana lives)

Tatiana slowely opens up and tells me her story.

She lived a life of plenty. She had her own clothing store, was preparing to marry a nice man and was loved by many people. She attended church and thanked God for the blessing life.

A little over six months ago she found out she was expecting. Her husband to be seemed to withdraw himself from her, eventhough this was his baby. Within a week he had taken all her money, her clothing, her juwelery and left her, to go to another woman. Tatiana was left with no choice but to ask for help. Her friends turned her down, as she had become a single mother to be... a disgraceful position to be in. Her inlaws who used to love her refused to speak to her. She had no-where to go and no-one willing to help her. She could no longer afford her previous lifestyle. In one day she turned from a middle class citizen to the poorest of the poor.

Robbed, completely robbed from opportunity, dignity and choice.

My heart was in turmoil listening to her story.

She continued to tell me that she is blessed to be alive and have shelter. But many days she stays in her room and just sleeps the day away, no food, no friends.

Tatiana proudly tells me the baby will be a boy, she'll name him KWISERA (trust). But her countenance changes as she shares that she even considers to give her baby away after she delivers, as she does not know how to provide for him. I fell tears welling up in my eyes and with a deep sadness I watch her as she keeps grabbing her bible expressing how God has been the only thing that has kept her going. How she keeps holding on to him, knowing that He knows of her and her situation. How this very moment is and expression of God to her. This women expresses such a faith and security in God. He was all she had left! I know that if I would not know God as my Lord and Saviour her testimony and her solid faith would make me cry out; "Yes Lord, I believe!"

Everything within me wants to grab her and tell her everything will be just fine... but will it? Could I make such a promise? Instead I grab the bag with items I brought for her and as I give her the items she just looses it and grabs me, she cries and cries uncontrollably, thanking God for listening to her cries for help. As I hold her I cry with her. And I come to the humble realization that my only reason to be with Tatiana is because God desired to express His love for her, and I just happened to be the tool he used. This was a Tatiana-God moment and I better not get in the way of it.

Tatiana is precious to me, very precious, because I know God wanted her to know that He hears her and cares for her. A friend recently sent me newborn baby boy cloths, just to give away. Christine, thank you, know that God used you to provide for Tatiana's baby boy!

Please pray for Tatiana, her due date is April 25th.

Be encouraged! Just as God listens to the prayers of this young mom-to-be, and expresses His love for her, He does the same for you! He listens and knows of your every need.
Today the Lord did a miracle for Tatiana. He can do a miracle for you!

Heaven Touching Earth to be...

2007-03-10T12:09:00.000+02:00

Bossi, Bossi, amakuru? (boss, boss, how are you?) We're out in Kibuye on some hidden mountains by our property. The view is breath taking as always. The desire of living on our property with 256 orphans and at least 32 widows gets stronger as I notice this young boy and his friend. Their cloths were ripped, the zipper of the boy's pants did not even close. I wonder what kind of life they live and if they even have parents or hopefully at least a mom.

Bossi... bossi... he yells. What will he say two years from now when he will see us there 24/7?

He makes me smile and the excitement of Gods purposes for this place bubbles inside of me.

We took a boat and went to see our land from the water. As you can see it is huge! All the land you see is for HTE (Heaven Touching Earth!) I remember when we had the dream, visions and the scriptures all referring to this place at the water with orphans and widows living on it. A place where heaven touched earth. Where the presence of the Lord would be so strong. Where people all ages would be on their faces before the Lord, where he would restore them and make them whole...

And now here we are... communicating with architects, writing the plan for this place, meeting with ministers and leaders of big organizations to learn from their experiences. In the mean time I feel so humbled by the greatness of this project. The logistics scare me, the funding needed makes me want to run from it all... I fee like king Salomon when he took his father, David's, place. He cried out to God and said; Oh Lord I don't know how to be a good king help me. Give me a heart of wisdom.

...yet the Lord keeps opening the doors before us. Showing us we are to keep going, step by step obeying him as He leads. It sounds so easy...

We were welcomed to our property by these kids and the cows!

Beautiful wild flowers on our land.

Land Identification in Kibuye

2007-02-26T20:11:00.000+02:00

Today was a big day! So we dressed all nice as we would be meeting several government officials. I came with high heels and all! In my excitement I focused on the "looking good" for the occasion to much. We drove with some of the officials in the direction of Lake Kivu. We turned from the mainroad unto a rocky road. After about 10 minutes the road came to an end with the announcement that we had to continue by foot....

What was I thinking... So there I went for another 20 minutes on my heels, sliding over the rocks due to a lack of grip... Feeling like an old woman when Travis grabbed my arm preventing me from falling I wondered why I wanted to look so nice. Wasn't the special occasion Identifying land? DUH....

When we arrived at the suggested land I was ready to set up camp and stay forever. The beauty of this place... The lake, the mountains, pretty birds and butterflies, gorgeous flowers. I was humbled at the sight of such beauty!

The land the government wants to give to SoZo Ministries Africa for the development of an orphan childrens village goes from the boats in the water following the treeline up. The whole area in the photo including the scrubs in the fore ground are part of the land.

The trees in the very back are that same tree line again, all land seen is part of it.

The photo's above were looking southwest. This photo is looking north. The second point from the left, the ending of an island would also be partof SoZo Ministries land....

The land is not ours yet, paperwork and other logistics are still part of the process. Pray fot Gods will to be done and for us to find an architect who can draw plans for rough terrain! God has been amazing us. Today was one of those days where I feel so tiny in comparison to His Masterplan. God is good!

Till Death Do Us Part.

2007-02-11T12:17:00.000+02:00

Brutus and Darlene Simpson. Brother and sister of the groom. Dressed to go the wedding of our beloved brother Stanley and his not so loved wife to be Becky, we received our instructions. Brutus was not fond of Becky as she controlled Stanley and wanted to take over the travel agency that Brutus and Stanley had set up together. I, Darlene could not stand Becky as she interfered with the close relationship I had with both my brothers.
Becky came from a wealthy family yet we had to work hard for our money. She was favored by her dad, a maffia boss and her mom over her little sister Gina. Gina could not stand Becky. Becky had dumped Ken over my brother Stanley, poor Ken was heart broken yet attended the wedding, hoping to move on and love again after the wedding was over. I really liked Ken and made sure he had all the support he needed during the wedding. My dad though, he had just sold a serious life insurance policy to Becky, She was worth at least one million dollars. Though I tried to warn my brothers Stanley (groom), Brutus and my parents that this wedding should not be happening, They did not listen well to me.
To top it off I found out that Becky had been unfaithful to my brother and her lover was at the wedding also with his new girl friend. I could not resist telling her the news, and oh was she furious!
Yes many people, many motives to kill, but really who did it. While listening to a speech from one of my brother's friends the lights turned of... the sound of a shotgun went off and... the bride was dead on the floor. Panic, accusations and criesof shock went through the room, who did such a brutal thing! Before I knew it people surrounded me with accusations. No I did not like Becky and I did not want to see this marriage happen but still... to go to this extreme?
My brother Brutus was very concerned for our brother Stanley. Poor Stanley was heart broken. While people were trying to figure out who killed the bride, they even bribed each other. People were yelling at each other calling eachother names. it was quite the scene.
To my shock my brother Stanley "fell" of the balcony... dead. My world collapsed, I lost all self controll, oh my dear brother, was this suicide, an accident, murder?
The police officer came to release all evidences and inform us who had murdered the bride. I could not believe it when I heard what happened. Because of the threat to my brothers business, Brutus had killed Becky. Thinking this would save the business and save our brother from a broken heart later in life. Stanley really had to much to drink as he was heart broken over the loss of his wife and got to close to the end of the balcony...
And no, I really did not have anything to do with either death...

We had so much fun last night as we dressed to match up for the role we played. There must have been at least 50 people all playing a part in this mystery murder game. Some people I will only know by the name of the role they had as I have no clue what their real name is!
Not much happens in Kigali, and there are no theatres or movie places, so this was definately a wonderful event for us!

Our last GFR village day

2007-02-06T21:01:00.000+02:00

A day of mixed emotion would best discibe today. It was our last day with GFR in the village. A wonderful day with a touch of sadness.

The YWAM team from Hawaii joined us again. The minibus they were in broke down nearby the meeting place in Mutete. Jumping on top of the landcruiser was not a problem at all making it quick and easy to get them all to the location.
Our Muzee Vianney had been released from prison and was officially re-instated into his former position as field director. The families welcomed him with open arms. We all know it was an act of God to have him back with us so speedily! Thank You Lord!
As I mentioned, today was our last GFR village day. Febr 8th will be our last official day with GFR. Allowing us to focus 100% on our own ministry SoZo Ministries Africa. I started our meeting with the Rwandese proverb; Imihini Mishya Itera Amabavu. Meaning; A new hoe handle causes blisters (or translated; change isn't easy). As I explained our departure I noticed many sad faces and I couldn't help but to feel a lump in my throat and I wondered who the change would not be easy for, me or them. After all I have spent at least 40 hours per week doing research, learning Rwandese culture, listen to government oficials brainstorm with my staff all with these precious people and their journey out of poverty in mind. I looked and remembered how we found some of them in small bush homes. Rags on their bodies and now, they look healthy and have a smile on their face. Some of them will never leave my heart, their faces will forever be in my memory.
I officially introduced them to their new GFR Country Director; Cyprien. We prayed for him as a GFR team, it was a powerful moment. The families welcomed him warmely. I felt a relief coming knowing that Cyprien loves his people and knows them well! After all he has been my main teacher!
The YWAM team did some drama's for the families all focusing on the power of the cross and Jesus! The people loved it, laughing loudly where they recognized things from their own life yet having a silent respect where Jesus was displayed.
The drama's were a great opening to Travis his teaching on wholeness in Christ. "Everything is possible with God" he said. "Freedom from trauma, healing of your body, salvation of your soul, persue God and he can do it!" Travis mentioned several scriptures about people persuing God out of desperation and God bringing wholeness.

Our last GFR village day continued 1.

2007-02-06T21:00:00.000+02:00

Travis asked the people to place their hands on the area of their body where they were hurting. If they have nighmares and or trauma to place their hands on their heart and head, but if it was all hurting just to raise your hands to God! Looking at the photo you might get an idea of the heavy load these people carry daily.Today was another gift giving day, where the sponsors had sent money for their families to receive animals. We had another 18 cows, 31 pigs and mattresses to distribute. The cow is like a crown on the kings head, needless to say people were excited about their gifts!

Our last GFR village day Continued 2.

2007-02-06T20:56:00.000+02:00

The old directors and the new.

Some of my village friends that I will never forget.

The Ywam team and all GFR staff.

It was another wonderful day, with great friends in a precious nation with beautiful people.

Yaida One Year Old Today

2007-02-05T20:16:00.000+02:00

The first photo we have of Yaida, when she was 3 weeks old.
Today this little angel turned one year old! If it weren't for God opening our heart to her, would she have ever had a first birthday? Loving the attention and having to sing "Happy Birthday" to her all day, she clapped and danced a lot today.

May I blow out the candle yet?

Really? It is ok to dump my face in the cake?Hi Hi, Alright here I go!

Happy Birthday Princess! You are loved.

"My Space"

2007-02-03T12:32:00.000+02:00

How many children fit in one bath tub?
I am always amazed at the level of tolerance Nani and Zoey have concerning space. True that in Rwanda people like to be squezed. This is after all the most densely populated nation of Africa. Taking public transport you are squezed into a minivan with at least 4 adults in a row. I call it "hiphugging". When in church the sport seems to be to get as many people to squeze together on one little wooden bench. Even in the gorcery store I feel as if everybody has to stare at the same item I stare at just so they can squeze me... Claustrofobic?
Sometimes I want to wear a hula hoop around my hips, just to mark "my space".
Yet I look at my daughters; in the back seat of our car we have 2 child seats for the babies. The left over space barely fits a teenager. Yet both Nani and Zoey are used to the discomfort of hiphugging and just squeeze in...
They share a double bed, works great for the two of them. When they have a friend spent the night she too hiphugs right in... They than throw in the cat at least one big stuffed animal for each of them, some books and other random items...
Interestingly enough coming from a lifestyle of needing "my space" I find myself able to give up this "right" of space. Almost to the point where I expect to be hiphugging with someone at some point of my day. I actually find it kind of cozy, especially in the village it gives me a feeling of participation and unity.
When the body becomes what it is; a shell for the true part of a person; his spirit man, or soul instead of this "item" of glorification of special rights and needs, a person can enjoy the warmth and closeness of another shell. Let me explain what I mean; My body, my space, my physical needs... this was part of my morals my values to respect that in myself and others. This has changed over the time living in Rwanda. Observing my Rwandan village friends and particular bible verses have humbled me to get a grip of the purpose of a body. My village friends toil and sweat all day. Walking for hours and hours doing hard, very hard physical work. They produce offspring and eat away their hunger.
"Therefore, offer your bodies as a living sacrifice..." "The flesh is at war with the spirit(man)" "Without faith it is impossible to please God" All these verses from the bible show me life is not about the body at all. I know you know this. The question remaining is; why do we try to solve inner wounds; disapointments, abandonment issues, depression, trauma's with physical salutions...
Why do I feel I need my space... what in me causes me to get claustrophobic hips...
I know the Lord has done a work in me of restoration and perspective, He has opened my eyes to the value of the body and the great tool it is to express love, friendship, unity and acceptance. For so long I believed the body to be this elevated private element of a being, in need of space and respect. I have lacked expressing love, giving comfort and physical acts of frienship as a result. Rwanda's beautiful people opened my eyes, God changed my perspective as he healed my wounds "in need of space". Now I can hip hug without claustrofobic hips...

So how many children fit in one bath tub? You do the math!

Jasmin 1 Year Old

2007-02-02T11:12:00.000+02:00

Jasmin, shortly after her birth exactly one year ago.
And here she is today, one year old, walking and talking. She loves to chase the kitty and goes crazy over the dog. Precious beautiful girl. Happy Birthday Jas! I love you!

This is for me?

Attack!

Jasmin 1 Year Old continued

2007-02-02T10:54:00.000+02:00

Happy Birthday to me....

Jasmin was very serious about opening and testing her present. She absolutely loved it.

YWAM in Kavumu 1

2007-01-30T19:02:00.000+02:00

Upon arrival in this little village in the Kavumu sector, I noticed a stable looking contruction. While some man were vigurously cutting branches and place it as a roof on this construction, I asked in my best Kinyarwandan if this was a houe for a cow. As you see in the photo's, my thoughts were wrong. But it was wonderful for the patients and doctors to have some privacy and to be protected from the hot burning sun while in their make shift clinic.

The doctors, Dan and Rosanne with their patients and translators. (By the way, Cyprien could be a village doctor by now with all his medical knowledge and skill!)

Others helped the families with the start of the seed bed. The land worked on will be used for a seedbed and pig farm, all to the benefit of the GFR families and the community. Big branches had to be cut and land leveled. Many of the villagers looked with approval on those hacking the trees with machette's. A tough job!

This beautiful toothless 11 month old baby stole my heart. She had the best smiles (believe me she did!) and her mom was just as beautiful and sweet.

YWAM in Kavumu 2

2007-01-30T19:00:00.000+02:00

The team spent much time ministering to people, leading some to salvation and being an encouragement to others.

PLEASE HELP!

This young woman came with her 3 year old daughter and one year old son to the clinic she is on the list to get sponsored. As you can see, the baby on her lap is very mal nourished. The poor boy cried and cried without stopping. If you want to do something effective,, please consider sponsoring this woman and her family through GFR. All she eats is sweet potatoes. Her baby is sick and mal nourished. The 3 year old child looks much younger than she is. These people are in great need! Please help them.
I looked at this baby and remembered when we first picked up our daughter Yaida at the orphanage. It was a hard call for me to sit with this woman while her baby is crying and remember my own baby...

Want to change a life? This is your opportunity!

We prayed for the woman and the baby. Believing God for a miracle! Are you the next miracle?

Love and Compassion

2007-01-25T11:33:00.000+02:00

This week the YWAM team from Kona Hawaii joined us for another house building time. Leveling the side of the mountain for the start of the foundation of the house. The team has been blessed with Dan and Rosanne, who are a doctor and Nurse. They brought a big suitcase and backpack filled with medication and set up clinic in the "yard" of the neighbor.
While some were digging and leveling Dan and Rosanne helped many people in the open air clinic, where many came for stomach problems and skin deseases. After practising medicine the team took the time to pray with people, leading at least 5 people to Jesus! It was such a beautiful time. Let the photo's speak for themselfs, as you see love and compassion oozing out!

Love and Compassion continued

2007-01-25T11:11:00.000+02:00

At the end of the day when many were tired of the hard physical work we sat down with the owners of the home we held clinic and helped harvesting the beans, What started with a small group quickly multiplied, leaving the family blessed with many harvested beans.

Kibuye town of horror

2007-01-15T20:13:00.000+02:00

After our meeting with the mayor of Kibuye we drove around checking out land for our orphan project. As we drove we saw her; this beautiful church partially hiding behind old trees, yet standing tall on the mountain. How could we not stop. We had read the testimonies of survivors, heard about the horror. People ran into this church thinking to be save, only to be brutaly murdered. Women, men, children alike, no-one was to be spared, yet few survived hiding under their dead friends and families bodies.As soon as I stepped foot on the compound a heaviness fell on me. I felt as in a daze. I wonder if I noticibly stumbled or looked drunk while walking, I had a hard time keeping balance and thinking straight. I stared at the paintings on the walls, the same paintings many stard at while in fear for their live. Wondering how so many could have been killed in this church my immagination took over seeing bodies piled on top on eachother. My stomach turned, I felt like crying. I turned to Travis hoping he would somehow wake me out of these visions, his expression showed what I was feeling. We left the church in a deep silence, stumbeling our way to the car.

So many murders back then, so many wounds now. The impact of such an event in the community, in the life of precious people. Kibuye was hit the hardest during genocide and is known today for it's highest ranking orphan population in Rwanda.
Today has been an eyeopener to me as to why God chose Kibuye for SoZo Ministries Africa. Wow, I am appaled, overwhelmed. Sadened yet delighted. Fearful yet trusting God. Kibuye will one day be my hometown, I hope it to be soon. From trauma to freedom... God did it for me, He will do it for the people in Kibuye.

Gift Giving Day

2007-01-11T18:27:00.000+02:00

About 250 sponsored GFR families gathered on Tuesday to be encouraged for the new year. They were enouraged to see 15 extra volunteers come from Kigali representing Canada, Japan, Thailand and the United States, helping with the distribution of the gifts sponsors had bought for their Rwandan families. The local and provincial government came out to be with us all so did a reporter.
I Encouraged the families with the story Jesus told, of the talents. The talents being opportunities, if used wisely they bring great benefit and reward, if waisted hope goes also. It is so much fun to use Jesus' illustrations, they were just made for the villagers! They all got the message and I was pleased to hear the local government represented reinforce Jesus' story.
I used this presious little girl as an example for a story. She must have been nurvous, I could feel her heart beat rapidly under my hand. Cyprien, my brother, yes we do look alike... (don't we Cyp!) is translating for me.
The YWAM team from the DTS inKona Hawaii joined us, helping us a great deal, we could not have done this day without their help. Many of them just hang out with the kids, singing songs and playing games. Just precious. They made many little friends that day! Thanks guys for your loving heart to these precious people!

2007-01-11T18:10:00.000+02:00

Dan; cowboy at heart spend the day catching and holding goats. Thanks Dan, you sure made the goat collecting station go fast and flexible!
The Mattress distribution post, this post definately showed that it is a bessing to give...
Everybody left that station with a smile!
Some received mosquito nets, with Malaria still being one of the main causes of death, this gift was received with joy by all!
Many people, many gifts,; 18 cows, 5 houses, 22 mattresses, 50+ pigs and goats, 53 mosquito nets and many miscalaneous gifts. Just awesome! So much joy!

2007-01-11T17:57:00.000+02:00

Cow girls in training.

And some received a pig.

Pascal, Trav, Cyprien and Bosco. People who have become more then staff, they are our brothers.
We had just a fabulous day, thanking all sponsors for their generous donations. And special thanks to Aubrey and the YWAM Kona DTS team for their hard work and joy! Thanks guys!

Opa In Rwanda

2006-12-27T18:57:00.000+02:00

When we learned my dad would be in Rwanda for a day and half, we packed our bags and drove to Ruhengeri where he would be staying. Not knowing how long we would have together we prepared to spend the night in a guesthouse. My phone rang right when we arrived at the parking lot of Kanigi guesthouse at the foot of the vulcano's; home to the gorilla's. (the ones Diane Fossey worked with). It was my dad on the other end of the phone saying it would be better for us to stay in Kigali as he would have to leave very early in the morning. Surprised we had already arrived he quickly came to greet us.
We had a wonderful time together. We ended up spending the night in Ruhengeri town just so we could have a few more hours together. Though short it was so nice to see my dad.

My dad (opa) had never seen his newest two granddaughters. They both warmed up to him quickly and opa had no problem falling in love with them.

Yaida having a great time with her very proud opa.

Zoey is definately an opa's girl. She made sure she got all her snuggles in.
It had been over a year and half since we had last seen eachother, then for us to meet the day after Christmas was a special time. With Christmas music still playing in the back ground of the rstaurant we ate we all realized what a special blessing these precious hours together were.

Putting Christmas in Perspective

2006-12-26T10:00:00.000+02:00

It is so easy to block our minds and be focused on ourselfs. We found our girls getting so focused on potential gifts and forget the true meaning of Christmas. Nani realized the poor would not get anything nor be aware of Jesus being God's perfect gift to us.

So we loaded 2 boxes with new shoes and many cloths in the car and took a random dirt road outside Kigali. we drove a ways in until we noticed great poverty, we started to hand out cloths and shoes, hugging people and wishing them a good Christmas. The photo's speak for themselfs. People we surpised and happy. And for us... it helped to bring life in perspective again and to put our focus back on Christ, the reason for Christmas.

Putting Christmas in Perspective 1

2006-12-26T09:59:00.000+02:00

Nani has such a heart for the poor. She put the flip flops on this young boy and was so excited as if she herself had just received new shoes. We got the boy a new shirt also. He was so happy!

Noeli Nziza. Merry Christmas!

Christmas in Rwanda

2006-12-26T08:19:00.000+02:00

Christmas was a special event this year, with two new daughters and my beautiful big girls who really understand Christ. When thinking about family and friends I found myself getting sentimental, not so much desiring to go to them, but for them to be with us... I have been overwhelmed with the feeling of family. Growing up as an only child the sense of family was foreign to me. But watching my daughters sit around listening to the Christmas story, talking about it, singing Christmas songs, enjoying their presents and helping the babies open theirs, I felt blessed. Now I know what family looks like, what it feels like, more then ever before.

Yaida's Christmas could have been so different. The thought of all the orphans, the poor who would spend their day cultivating as if it were a day like no other sobered my day. When merry Christmas is really not so merry... Yaida, she blesses us so much with her joy, the thought of her by herself in the orphanage chokes me up. Thank you Lord for bringing her into our family!

Jasmin loved opening presents, as we cheered her on she would dance for us before ripping the paper!
Nani and Zoey had asked for a kitten in a box with a bow on it... and so it happened to their great surprise and excitement. It is the cutest little thing ever the name is still being discussed.

One of Travis' presents was TACO BELL items... Here he is on Cloud 9! He believes in heaven again! Thanks Aaron and Kendra, you made his day!

Thank you to everyone who has sent Christmas greetings our way and blessings in various ways! At noght we hosted a hug christmas party. With about 50 people showing up in our way to small house we had lots of fun, played games and ate wonderful food. We even had turkey and stuffing. I made a waldorf salad (an expensive treat here, thanks to all who sent us Walnuts!) and tripple fudge chocolate cake (thanks Steph!) with loads of garlic bread, yummie tea's (thank you Mirjam!) and gooedies for the kids (thanks Aaron and Kendra). Everyone seemed to have brought and shared their best kept recipe's and western goodies. It was a great time. To know that home is where your heart is and to see this in action is powerful. Here we were a load of people without family, but with new found life long friends that made Christmas a special experience.

MERRY CHRISTMAS!

2006-12-24T09:02:00.000+02:00

We wish you a wonderful Christmas and blessings of Health, Joy, and Peace for 2007!

Travis, Astrid, Nani, Zoey Jasmin & Yaida

Muzungu Umuganda

2006-12-23T22:50:00.000+02:00

Today we were able to bring 13 people out with us to Zoko and work on the house of Abdu. We worked on his house in November also, compare the photo from the November blog and remark the enourmous progress.

Good job Cyp and Kyle!
Those rocks will make excellent foundation for the stale.

These mud bricks are some of the ons we made last time... They are so heavy... what is in them?

The progress, the walls are almost coplete,,, very exciting!

2006-12-23T21:22:00.000+02:00

Nani showing off her muscles from all the hard work she had been doing.

Bernard and Kyla, nice teamwork. Those dried mudd bricks are heavy!

Todd and Travis terracing the land for the future building of the animal stable.

Koen and his new friend gathering mudd for the mortar.

Zoey hoeing under supervision of Emerithe and Ki.

2006-12-23T21:00:00.000+02:00

Young and old; all had a share in the work today. New friendships were build.

Lauren went for the mudd brick making.. A skill she mastered very well during November's umuganda. The kids were all excited to have their teacher with them and loved helping her.

Some of the GFR sponsored families and all the people that came out from Kigali to help and encourage Abdu and his family! Thank you to all of you that came and joined us today! We had a great time with you, your hard work is much appreciated! Thanks.

Snowmen in Africa

2006-12-17T15:06:00.000+02:00

I went to the craft store to get the hot glue, felts,and other items I needed for the snowmen project I wanted to do with Nani and Zoey. I quickly ran by the fabric store and picked up some materials for the scarfs and hats of the snowmen...

No not really... It goes more like this; I looked for some old kids socks for hats and used my dust rag for a scarf. I found some black wire from headphones that don't work, for the making of the mouth. Thanks to the Nelson's package I had wrap that would be the snowman's body color and styrofoam chips to use for filling of the hats. The nose was the hardest as marker didn't work on the foam, but I found a jello box in my kitchen that was orange... Needless to say there was no hot glue, nor felt to use, but as a team the girls and I succeeded in making these good looking snowmen. Topped off with powdered sugar it looks like it really snowed (I just pray the ants won't be attracted to it!!!)

All snowmen are made by Nani and Zoey and are now on display in our livingroom!

Klap een in je handjes! (a Dutch song)

2006-12-16T07:45:00.000+02:00

Klap eens in je handjes , blij, blij, blij...Op je kleine bolletje allebei...

Handjes in de hoogte, handjes in de zij...Zo varen de scheepjes voorbij...

"Make me your child"

2006-12-12T23:59:00.000+02:00

Poverty is al around us 24/7. It is a hard reality and not always easy to deal with properly. Wherever I stop my car people will surround the car asking for food or money. It is so sad, heartbreaking.
I go through times where I do my best to ignore the poor as much as possible, or am I just not wanting to feel compassion as compassion moves me to action? Hmmm...
Out in the streets and in the villages I can pick and chose whom I want to help. I can see a need and do my best to fill it or I can close the eyes of my heart and pretend the needy do not exsists. But what to do with a need as highlighted in the letter?
"Would you make me your child forever?"

We have been asked many things and have provided many ways to help, but this... Really what do we do? This poor young orphan boy has no roof over his head and lost the ability to continue school as there is no income due to the death of his mom.

Do we feel honored or insulted by such a request? Do we use wisdom by ignoring him or reach out and provide "I do not know what..." ?

I am reminded of scriptures; True religion that the Father wants is to take care of the widows and orphans... You will always have the poor among you... You are an hypocrit by saying to a poor man; God bless you and do not help him in his need...

This boy wants a mommy and daddy... My heart breaks... Where is the church, where are the mothers and fathers of the boy's community... Where is the remaining family the boy has... where, where, where...
Am I responsible for this boy? Will God hold me accountable for what I decide to do or not do concerning his situation?

You see, poverty is all around, making living in Africa confronting and difficult. I used to be "free" from the peoples cries for help inside my home. But here is this letter in my home with a burning question; "Will you make me your child..." What a desperate cry, what a responsibility... what will I do...
What would you do?

Sinterklaas in Rwanda!

2006-12-07T17:02:00.000+02:00

St. Nicholas, the original version of Santa is still respected and celebrated in the Netherlands and Belgium. And just like last year St. Nicholas came to Rwanda at the residence of the ambassador of the Netherlands in Kigali. Nani and Zoey also took part of the celebration and Jasmin and Yaida loved the pepernoten (ginger snaps) laying all over the place.

Jan Finnema, playing St. Nicholas, was recognized by his children, but this did not hinder them from experiencing a fun time. Yaida did not know that she actually knows this Zwarte Piet, played by Leontien.

The girls went home with tummies filled with perpnoten, candies, dutch cheese and Travis and I really enjoyed the crocet and haring. It was a fun event. We all felt very Dutch for a moment.

Akagera 1

2006-11-27T13:28:00.000+02:00

We took mom on a day safari to the National park Akagera in the east of Rwanda. It was a rainy day, giving Trav the ultimate fun of getting the car as filthy as possible. We saw many fun animals and really enjoyed the beauty of Gods creation.

I spy with my little eyes...

Akagera Continued

2006-11-27T13:20:00.000+02:00

It was just amazing that the giraffes would allow us to get so close to them. They are such beautiful creatures.

Boo!

Nani and Zoey kept track of all the animals we saw that day.

Fun in Kibuye

2006-11-22T11:07:00.000+02:00

Lake Kivu at it's best. Keep reading and make sure you read the "Fun or Nightmare" story about Kibuye.

More Fun in Kibuye

2006-11-22T10:45:00.000+02:00

We took an old wooden boat to explore the lake. But as you see behind Zoey the rainclouds came in quickly.
Zoey thought the best part of the boat ride was the wistle on her life jacket.

Nani brought a little net hoping to catch fish.
The wind started to pick up, turning the smooth mirrored lake into a chaotic mess. Sure enough it started pooring. We were soaked to the bone. Lightning and thunder were loud and magnificent, yet scary as we were far on the lake. It was just Nani, Zoey, my mom and me, we just laughed at our crazy adventure.

We stayed cold for a while but made a big fire and had real Nestle hot chocolate with mini marsh mellows (thank you Steph!).

Kibuye; Dream or Nightmare...

2006-11-22T09:52:00.000+02:00

Finally…The time had come
It was 3 years ago when Travis had a dream about a trauma and vocational training center located at a large lake. Orphans would come and live there in small family settings. They would receive schooling and training but most of all, they would receive Christ. Through times of worship and prayer they would experience God’s presence. His presence would heal them from trauma, from fear, from pain. They would be made whole by Jesus, their creator. These young orphans would become warriors for Jesus, they themselves ministering wholeness to the people around them, impacting this nation, impacting Rwanda.It was a wonderful dream…

While in a meeting with the minister of Gender and family Promotion, Trav asked her; “If I would set up such a center, where would you want me to go?” After some thought she said she wanted SoZo Ministries Africa in the area with the highest orphan rate of Rwanda; Kibuye… at Lake Kivu…

Finally, the time had come…
Almost packed and ready for our journey the news came to us that our cat, Boefje, had been attacked by wild dogs during the night. Her lifeless body was found by our guard. Needless to say we all cried and grieved the loss of Nani and Zoey’s favorite cat. We sadly finished loading the car and started our journey.We stopped to get more gas in our car. After confirming multiple times that the pump clerk new we needed diesel, he still put in super. After he asked us what we were going to do about it, we returned the question and gave him the answer also. Exactly one hour later the tank was cleaned out and filled with diesel, ready to go to our final destination.

When a God given dream, to good, to big, simply impossible to be true, starts to be confirmed, starts to slowly unfold and become reality… it has changed from a nice dream to the worst nightmare…
How would such a dream ever come true, the staff needed, funds for buildings and houses, equipment for living and training, moving into a yet undeveloped area of the country, schooling for my children… Dream or nightmare…

Trav met with the mayor of Kibuye who welcomed our desires as not many organizations come into this undeveloped, somewhat isolated area. Next week we will meet with him again and look at land. The mayor wants to donate land to us… Can you believe this?

We started our journey back home after our 3 day stay in Kibuye. Forgetting the frustrations form the start of our weekend, we were excited and joyful about the work God is doing and our involvement in it. After only half an hour things went from bad to worse. Lights came on on the dashboard, the steering locked up and strange noises came from yet other parts of the car. Sure enough, right when we were in an area that had no phone reception, in the middle of nowhere “kaboom!” a pipe exploded under the hood. Steam went everywhere. We knew we were stuck, babies and all. We felt like crying, now what will we do… God help!

No sooner after crying out to God we heard a car in the distance. We knew to get the car to stop and somehow receive help would take an act from God. And God acted…
The car drove past and quickly stopped. Some white faces looked at us, we recognized these people! These were our Dutch missionary friends! What are the odds… they even had space to take al 7 of us in their car…
Trav has a Rwandese friend that lives only half an hour from where we had to leave the car. He “happened” to be in his town… He “happened” to be friends with a great mechanic, who “happened” to be available and willing to fix the car late that Sunday night.

I don’t know about you, but reading our adventure I cannot help to realize that someone was trying to stop us from going to Kibuye, and to take our joy away after the Lord had opened amazing doors for us. This is called spiritual warfare. The reason; Satan does not want people to experience God, he does not want them to be free, to be whole. Satan simply does not want God to use SoZo Ministries Africa to bring freedom to the captive.Are we discouraged? No, on the contrary, we feel loaded with persistence to continue and pursue the direction God is starting to unfold for SoZo Ministries Africa.

More beautiful than gold!

2006-11-16T15:57:00.000+02:00

My precious baby. Isn't she just beautiful? Yaida is the littlelest clown I've ever known. She just has the ability to make me laugh so hard even when I am stuck in an attitude of frustration or bitterness. She just walks up to me and with her big joyful eyes gets my attention and makes the funniest faces you have ever seen a child make. What a girl!

A little while ago someone asked me; how can you do this, two babies, four kids total, you are missionaries, living by faith. How will you provide for an extra child, what about her study her medical care. Wasn't she better off in the orphanage?
Though such a statement makes me sad and helps me understand the speaker of such things has no idea what life as an orphan in an orphange is like, I could see the point. There is something to say for that and sometimes these same thoughts come to my mind.
Remember her name? Remember YAH-IDEA... (Gods idea)... hmmmmm. Often I am reminded by God that this was His plan, His idea, not so much my own.
Do you know the biblical story of the disciples passing a beggar. He asked for money but their reply was; Silver and gold I do not have, but what I have I give you. And the man was healed. He was restored, no longer needing to beg.

People take out a loan and buy big SUV's and nice equipment all the time. The value of their product decreases. Maybe at some point we will have to get a loan to pay for the schooling of our kids, but you know what? My value increases!!!

My precious baby Yaida, she is so valuable. This baby girl is more to us than anything we can ever obtain or strive for. She truly is YAH-IDEA. An amazing one, I must say!

Beautiful Teamwork 1

2006-11-13T12:41:00.000+02:00

Thank you to everyone who came along!

Just this last Saturday we spend the day in Gaseke with Abdul and Delphine. They were blessed with a new piece of land and the opportunity to build a house. We brought many people along from various churches and organizations including some diplomats. We had a wonderful time and were able to do a lot, encouraging the villagers with our labor.

Lauren making mudd bricks, she wouldn't stop! Lauren you're amazing, all our staff think you should change acarriers and become a professonal brick maker! (Now, this is a compliment...LOL!)

Even Jasmin played in the dirt, making an attempt to help

Verry impressive Jacco!

Beautiful Teamwork

2006-11-13T11:47:00.000+02:00

Guy(with bandana) and Marijn chatting with very old Muzee's

Heleen (my mam) transporting rocks that will be used for the foundation of the house.

Leontien and Anne playing with mudd
Trying to blend in...

Beautiful Teamwork.

2006-11-13T00:00:00.000+02:00

Moving Dirt, drastic terracing to make the house last against erosion

Jair taking a break

Everybody, young and old helped. Many of the children liked to mix the dirt and water with bare feet, others helped transport water and rocks yet others helped move dirt and make mudd bricks. The villagers loved the interaction and the children enjoyed making new friends.

Richard having a good time

Mudd fight with my mom.

When happiness is gone.

2006-11-08T10:27:00.000+02:00

Lately most of my days are started off by 40 laps of struggle at the pool. Satisfied with my accomplishment I get ready for the day. Today while in deep thought I heard this all to familiar sound, followed by a feeling of sadness.

Hearing that lawnmower in the distance took me back to my backyard in Oregon. I saw the beautiful green lawn, I smelled the small forest connected to it, I heard the birds and the sounds of the neighborhood. I saw my house, the beautiful light wooden floors, and my favorite green wall. Comfortable furniture, colors that made me at ease. I saw my kitchen counters, so easy to keep clean, my favorite coffee mug and the old piano that I loved to play. I saw my friends, their children and the joy they brought. I smell coffee… the smell of friendship.

Fighting back my tears I look at myself in the mirror. These words come to my mind; life is not about happiness but satisfaction. Lately I have encouraged many of my unhappy missionary friends with these words. Words from my life’s lesson this past year:

Happiness is very much dependent on the circumstances one is in. Happiness needs to be maintained, obtained. It changes day by day. When difficulties happen, happiness is far to be found.

Yet when one is satisfied there seems stability and perserverance. When difficulties happen the person is able to face them and deal with them as the satisfaction of the over all life will carry the person through the difficulties. Satisfaction will make someone last even when the situation is not a happy one.

I cannot help but to think about the happiness I experienced in Oregon. So many people, activities and things made me happy there. Yet through all my years there I had emptiness, a lack of satisfaction. Now living in Rwanda I lack happiness. So much I wish for…Yet the satisfaction I experience through my ministry, the struggles and the joys is satisfying beyond belief. I could do this the rest of my life and just suck up the frustrations and hassles. I could go without the typical comforts and stuff that would bring about happiness. To feel satisfied is such a powerful thing. It brings so much peace and stability. It brings a joy that is deep.

I get out of the dressing room and see the lawnmower that started my thought process. I smile as I notice it even looks like the one I used to have and I agree with myself that my life, one of satisfaction surpasses one if happiness.

Time can tell...

2006-11-01T08:06:00.000+02:00

We have only been in Rwanda for 15 months. But our life style would indicate a longer stay.

A while ago I had prepared a nice dinner for visitors. With only a few minutes before their arrival I jumped into the shower as I still had the village smell from earlier that day on me. There was no electricity, so while I go through my shower ritual, by candle light, a big roach jumped from the cracks of the ceiling right on my shoulder. I am talking big roach (2 1/2" or 5cm long)! I brushed him off of me causing him to do back stroke in the shower. As I was in such a hurry did not have the time to kill the thing, remove his guts and dump him in the toilet, so instead I made him a prisoner under my soap holder.
Forgetting about the roach, he was found later that night by Travis who killed him.

Nani and Zoey love to watch DVD's in the evening. So when they are lucky and we have electricity they love to cuddle up together, turn off the lights and watch their favorite movies for what seems like the 150th time. They are really into a movie when all of a sudden the whole neighborhood goes dark. Electricity gone... And all we will hear from the tv room is; "Oh man, not again, common let's get a lantern and color..."

The citywater goes off a lot. In those times we pray that we have sufficient water in our water tank to last us until the next time water is on. When there is no city water the water pressure is very very low. And when the pressure is low, it doesn't push the water through the hot water heater. Now in order for the water to heat we need... electricity.
Just the other day I realized that we, including the kids are used to the cold showers. When we turn open the hot water and it is actually hot we all scream; "Guys, get naked, we have hot water!" And we all line up to enjoy the hot water, no matter the time of the day.
Yet, as we have adapted to the cold water, we add so much cold to the hot, that is is almost cold anyways!

In the summer we had cattarpillars in our backyard, They looked cute and fuzzy but cause a chemical reaction upon touch. Nani and Zoey would be playing outside, when all of a sudden the one would lean on the other; "I stepped on a cattarpillar." They know the drill. Sit down while mom makes the local treatment; salt and water paste and keep heaping it on the splinter like spikey's, stuck in the burning skin. There is no cry, no whining. But we all know that it hurts...

It was just two nights ago when, again, there was no electricity. Trav and I are enjoying our late night coffee by lantern light as I see what I preseve to be a large lizzard. The lizzards eat mosquito's so we leave them unharmed in our house. I look again and realize that this is a very big lizard. I get up to check it out and find my lizard friend to be a snake (the one above). As the light was so faint in the house I yelled to Trav:"Quick, bring me a flashlight and the camera.."
He is already on his way. After watching the snake for a while I wonder if the thing could be dangerous, so I get the kitchen knife for Trav to kill it.
We brought it outside to show our compound manager who tells us that it is a dangerous snake. Just one bite and a little time can do great harm...

I read all this again only to be amazed. The things that make many others frustrated, upset or even cause great fear we see as challenges and just deal with them as they come. Not just Trav and me but also our children. There is no fear but peace. There is no panic but dealing with every situation as it comes.
Now, have we been in Rwanda to long to come to this place of peace?

I called this posting "time can tell". Though I think part of this is adapting, which is a time issue, I believe a deeper work is going on, and I want to give the credit for it to God.
As we have accepted and agreed the calling he gave us I believe he has transformed our minds and abilities to be fit for our life in Rwanda. Thank you God for this life we may live. I am truly amazed at the works You do ! You are indeed who You say You are!

KICS

2006-10-26T22:50:00.000+02:00

Kigali International Community School...Thank you to all of you who have contributed to Nani and Zoey's education. You have no idea how blesses we all are. Nani and Zoey both love school so much that they feel it to be unfair that they don't have school in the weekend. Zoey even feels that church should be cancelled so that school can happen at the same time....

Above; Zoey with Asaf, Peter-Ryan, Koen and Joshua.

Nani with her friends Rebecca, Caleb and Tylor.
We thought we had lost our girls, as they turned into little monsters in their prior school. Than having them home we saw positive chances in their behaviour, but as they were home for 6 months we all turned into mad people. Now that the girls are in a save place, a place that focuses on God, on proper self-worth and biblical values, we have received our girls back. Finally we recognize Nani and Zoey as the girls we raise. There is laughter in the house, attitudes are disappearing, obedience is on the rise again...
Thank you!! And a special thank you to Lauren Zumbrum, Nani and Zoey's teacher, who has been raisin gher own support to come for a 2 year commitment to Rwanda to teach at KICS. Thank you Lauren. The girls love you and so do we, you are awesome!

Bottom Blessing

2006-10-23T17:07:00.000+02:00

834 diapers and 5760 wetwipes...
Bottom Blessing!!

When we received an email with the note; "let us know what we should bring for you in our container" the choice was easy. One hundred dollars worth of diapers and another one hundred for wetwipes. Though we use the cloth ones we received through an amazing missionary diaper grant, we use disposables for on the go and at night.
Some of you may have heard my complains of the scary prices of items in Rwanda. Diapers are part of them. The cheapest we can get dispsables for is

$12 for 34 diapers making this $0.35 per diaper and
$7.50 for 70 wetwipes making this $0.10 per wipe !!!

Today was the day to pick up our bottom blessings! Even the babies were stocked about them. They kept crawling to their room climbing up on the boxes.
Thank you Todd and Jessica for bringing us bottom blessings!